Maid Number 167
by Dark Angelic Kitty
Summary: SasuSaku AU// She was known as Maid no.167 out of 254 servants in the Uchiha household. She has a name, but only her dorky roommate knows it. He was known as the God of Sex and guess what? His name was even more popular than Jesus. Uhoh I sense chemistry.
1. My: Beginning

**WARNING: This is not a very Karin-happy story.**

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**Maid Number 167**

SasuSaku AU// She was known as Maid no.167 out of 254 servants in the Uchiha household. She has a name, but only her dorky roommate knows it. He was known as the God of Sex and guess what? His name was even more popular than Jesus. Uh-oh I sense chemistry

**By: DAK**

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**B E G I N N I N G**

Why?

WHY?

Why does God have to dump every stinkin' bad thing on her? Why can't He dump all these crap onto someone like…like…like Uchiha Sasuke?! He deserves this more than her!

_That good for nothing spoiled bastard!! _

Everything happened so fast. First, she remembered herself eating a big scoop of vanilla ice cream on a bright sunny day by an ivory beach. Then she saw her dad waving in the horizon, calling her to join him and her mom for a barbeque dinner. She was so content with everything until her dorky roommate, Banana, woke her up from her sweet saccharine sleep. It was then she realized it had all been just a dream.

Well, she kind of already knew it was a dream because her mom passed away three years ago. There was no way anyone can bring the dead back to life. Not even God. But still, she wanted to stay in her cozy little dream more than anywhere else. And she definitely want to stay there than a place like…_this. _

The Uchiha Mansion

_Ah yes…so how did I end up in this fricken mansion again?_ She asked herself in the dark wine cellar.

_Oh right…because of my stupid education!!_

Unfortunately, the only 'good' thing God ever granted her since her birth was her ultra smart brain. She had been the only student in her tiny public school and community to ever get enrolled into Japan's richest, greatest, prestigious, not to mention p.r.i.v.a.t.e. high school.

Also known as Fiery Leaf High

Correction.

Fiery Leaf _Private_ High

Oh yes, one can absolutely not forget the word private. Because private usually means one thing that can be expressed in two simple words: **Expensive Tuition**.

Of course, she received her scholarship and all those ladee-dadee-dahs. But those money-greedy professors just _had_ to make tuition so ridiculously high that not even her scholarship can cover the cost. Her dad was absolutely heartbroken when he found out he couldn't pay for his only daughters' tuition. The salary he got from running his own little restaurant barely supported his family due to high taxation.

She didn't mind though because she never really cared about education. She just wanted to stay at home and help her beloved daddy run his tiny business. However on the contrary, her dad believed education was the most important thing right now and urged her to grab a hold of this opportunity. That way, she'll have a better chance of achieving a life that will out-beat his life any day. And thus, she did.

But first, she had to find an extra cheap place to stay and most importantly, she had to find a job.

After days of painstaking efforts, she finally found a solution to her problems. An old crunched up newspaper happened to hit her square on the face one day and just her luck, she saw an advertisement stating that the infamous Uchiha family was currently trying to find one hundred housemaids to work in their household. They offered food and shelter for each maid as long as she sign a one year contract to work.

God must surely love her, she thought.

_Not._

Although she managed to convince Fiery Leaf High's principal to lend her their 'golden' uber expensive textbooks so she can study independently during her spare time. And although she managed get the job at the Uchiha household, her life still officially sucked.

Ah, and here come's the million dollar question again. WHY?

Because:

- She was labeled and called Maid number 167, or for short, just 167. How creative.

- She had to wake up at eight in the morning. Well technically, seven in the morning if you want to eat breakfast. But she didn't care since she didn't like eating breakfast. In addition, she loved sleeping too much. Banana always had to wake her up for work.

- Her life was boring.

- She had to watch Uchiha Sasuke and his sick playboy ways.

- And…she had to wear a stupid wig.

It's not everyday people are born with pink hair you know and she, herself, knows that. So she bought a cheap short black wig that covered up her long naturally pink hair everyday just to fit in with the crowd a little bit more. Not even Banana knows about her secret or the fact that she was secretly studying the textbooks she had gotten from Fiery Leaf.

Aside from the hideous wig, she couldn't stand Uchiha Sasuke who lived alone in the mansion along with two-hundred-fifty-four other maids. (She didn't get why they would need that much maids to run the mansion.) Anyways, his brother, Itachi, had gone to work with their parents, Fugaku and Mikoto, in America which makes Sasuke a very free boy.

A very very free playboy.

He, like her, was enrolled into Fiery Leaf Private High. And unlike her, he had the money to pay for his tuition. He was a genius who aced all of his tests without studying, he was a jock that excelled in sports, he was hot to the point where every girl drools in front him, and he was a big fat arrogant jerk.

_He can kiss my ass! _She thought angrily and crossed her legs in a very unladylike manner. Oh well, no one could see her anyway.

Seriously, Uchiha Sasuke was such a big fat arrogant dickhead. He played around with girls, he broke innocent girls' hearts, and he was a daredevil. To some it all up, he was an evil heartless piece of shitty ice.

He flirted and made-out with maids along with every other possible girl alive. (Yuck!) And somehow, to her surprise, every girl still likes him! Including Banana. To make things worse, he had an evil yet drop-dead gorgeous girlfriend called Karin who tramples over the girls that Sasuke flirted with.

"So did you ever like Sasuke?" Her best friend, Yamanaka Ino, asked over the phone. Ino was her wealthiest friend that moved to America at an early age.

_Ok, fine! Yes! I did like Uchiha Sasuke. I did. Note the past tense! So what? Is that a crime? _She remembered answering furiously over the phone. So what if she lik**ed **Sasuke before? Fact: He was hot. Wouldn't you be attracted to people who you think are hot?

But after seeing his playboy behavior, she was totally turned off by the supposed King of Sex.

So back to the story.

Dang, everything went by so fast.

After being woken up by Banana, she hurried downstairs to do her shift of chores for the morning. By lunch, it was her turn to clear the dining table and so she quickly ran through the kitchen only to be interrupted by the notorious Sasuke-obsessed maid-in-charge, Mina, who ordered her to bring a bottle of 1967 wine to her since Sasuke requested it.

Of course, she had to listen to stupid Mina since she was the maid that was in charge of everything. In another words, the highest position amongst all maids. So, not wanting to get fired, she darted to the wine cellar and since God loved her oh-so-much, Sasuke happened to be in her way when she was about to run into the cellar. And then…

Kaboom!

World War III!

Nahh...something far worse than World War III.

She had accidentally ran into Sasuke causing both of them to tumble down the dark wine cellar. Unfortunately for them, the wine cellar door which was never closed due to the fact that it self-locks whenever it was shut, closed and officially locked them in.

_Mina is going to get soo mad…_ she thought with a groan. Even though she hated her job, she was not ready to get fired yet. And why did she ever end up getting locked up with the man she hates?! _Crap happens to me…_

"You're so clumsy." She heard Sasuke said in annoyance.

"I'm sorry sir." She replied politely. He was her boss after all.

Inner Sakura: Aargh, no I'm not sorry you bastard!!

"What's your name?" He asked impatiently.

_Damn…is he going to fire me?_

"Saku-err…I mean one-hundred-sixty-seven."

"..."

_Ok fine…don't reply you rude egghead. _

Yup, there she was. Trapped with her boss, Uchiha Sasuke.

_Grrreat! My first actual encounter with my boss..._

Truth to be told, this was her first very time talking to Sasuke. Not that she cared. But she just found it amusing since this is the first time they exchanged words after her three-month stay. So many girls would die to be in her position right now.

_Hah...screw them... fembots..._

"..."

Eh. The awkward silence again. She hated awkward silence more than anything.

_Damn...This is so not the life for a seventeen year old!_ She thought bitterly. She could see an outline of Sasuke's toned body a few meters away from her who was currently sitting on the floor like her. They had tried calling for help, knocking the door open, and a lot more methods that would possibly bring Scoffield to shame. But alas, none worked.

She sighed inaudibly and glared at a wall which is the same as glaring at the darkness because there wasn't any light in the room.

_Someone, help me. Banana…anyone… _

As if on cue, a violent noise could be heard from outside of the cellar causing both of them to jump up. The cellar door suddenly opened and a ray of comfortable light reflected warmly upon her.

_Freedommm!!!_

"ONE-HUNDRED-SIXTY-SEVEN!!! Get your butt out of there now!!!" Mina screech.

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Meet Haruno Sakura: the 167th maid out of 254 servants in the Uchiha household.

She's…

Smart.

Happily seventeen.

In deep deep trouble.

**Fin **

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**Before I type anything, I would like to credit certain things that gave me the inspiration for this fic. **

**- Ouran High School Host Club**

**- The awesome cliché maid-stories plot**

**- Ashiteruze Baby **

**I will be borrowing some of the ideas from different sources and add a little twist here and there. Don't worry, I'll credit them. **

**I've decided to portray Sasuke a little differently than my other fics. As you can see, he's an interactive lady's man in this fic. I'll try to make him stay in character though. But as a warning, he will be slightly possessive in the future. **

**Yup, that's about it! And for those who noticed, yes… this chapter was slightly re-edited as well as the other chapters. Enjoy. Ciao.**

Reposted on December 25, 2008


	2. Lucky Laundry

**Thanks for your reviews! Mwahz! **

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**L A U N D R Y**

"Sakura wake up!! Wake up!!"

Sakura pulled her eyelids open and saw Banana peering over her. "Mmugh…"

"It's eight-o-clock Sakura." Banana informed and adjusted her black thick-rimed glasses.

"Alright, I'm up. Thanks Nana." She yawned and got up. Banana smiled and went out. She always liked Sakura's nickname for her. It was better than her original name. How she wished her parents had never named her after some stupid fruit.

Sakura looked at the red-head's disappearing figure and sighed. Banana had been bothering her about the cellar incident non-stop. What did she see in that Uchiha-dick anyway? Sasuke this Sasuke that...it was annoying her.

She hastily brushed out her hair in the bathroom and her wig. Afterwards, she prepared for all the necessary things and set out to work with great distaste. Mina was just as worse as Banana when it comes to Sasuke. Maybe even worse. She kept a very close watch on her for the past week and made sure she was at least twenty meters away from Sasuke. It was hard because Sakura realized whenever Sasuke stepped into the forbidden perimeter; she always had to stop what she was doing and work on something else. In the end, she always had stay up really late in order to complete her job.

However, this was to be expected from Maid Number 1. (Mina)

Inner Sakura: First the loser! One hundred sixty seven the best!!

On top of her restrictions, Mina ridiculously banned her from setting up the dining table for each meal. In Sakura's opinion, it was the easiest job of all. But stupid Mina thought she might have another threatening fluff-scene with Sasuke at the dining table which will eventually bring down her relationship (hardly) with her beloved master.

Inner Sakura: On the good side... you won't have to see Uchiha's face.

_I guess...but setting up the dining table is so much easier than doing the laundry! _Her other self thought. The thought of doing laundries completely disgusted her. She had to sift through all those dirty clothes and look at other people's undies. Oh, let's not forget...after the laundries, you have to hang the clothes too. The thought of hanging 254 maid uniforms was equivalent to hell.

Sakura sighed and tugged at her black uniform skirt with white laces and a mini puffy apron. To go along with the stupid uniform, she had a little lacy hair band thingy to go with it. The Uchiha households are always in style, or so they claimed. Glaring at everything in her path, she slowly made her way to the bulletin board where their daily duties and shifts were posted each day.

The total population of maids were roughly divided into four groups with a group leader on the top and Mina as the leader of all four groups. Each group leader is responsible for assigning jobs to all the maids in their group each day and report to Mina on their progress. Luckily, she wasn't assigned as a leader which was picked randomly.

"Let's see...preparing lunch and dinner, laundry...yuck...eh?! Setting the table?! And what?! Serving Sasuke?!" Sakura gasped slightly as she read the board. She made sure twice until she was sure she read the thing right. A cheeky grin slowly made its way up to her mouth as she stared at the board. It looks like Mina had finally decided to let her off the hook.

Sakura looked at the mahogany grandfather clock beside the board and jumped a little. It was 8:45 am. _Shit. _She was late for work. She quickly ran to the kitchen and asked the head chef for instructions. The head chef hastily told her to make some dessert called the Strawberry Tiramisu Truffle and pushed a thick recipe book against her chest. Fortunately for her, the chef was too busy shouting at another maid who had screwed up on the soup to notice her tardiness.

_Strawberry Tiramisu Truffle...what the heck is that..._ Sakura mulled as she flipped through the worn-down book.

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**Master's Bedroom**

Sasuke yawned lazily and checked the clock to see the time. It was already ten minutes to twelve. He hoped the maids were cooking something good today for he was especially hungry. He had come home around two in the morning yesterday after playing basketball with Naruto and Suigetsu, his best buds. Getting up from his bed, he slipped into the showers to get ready for the day.

_Today's Saturday...what should I do? _He thought to himself, rubbing some soap onto his arm in the promise. Soon, a smirk formed as an unoriginal idea came to his mind. He decided to play around with his maids today. It's been ages since he has done something like that.

Last time he screwed around a maid was like…what…four days ago?

_Wow…that __**is**__ a long time. _

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**Main Dining Room**

Not wasting any time, Sakura carefully placed the silverwares on the table and made sure everything was in the right place.

"Alright, who's serving the young master today?" The head chef said in boredom which made Sakura like the chef very much despite her grumpy attitude. It seems like she and the chef were the only ones that aren't interested in Mr. Chicken-Head. The other maids on the other hand, squirmed as they prevented themselves from raising their own hands. They all wanted to serve Sasuke and stand by him to watch him eat and wait for him to give them a command to bring water or other things.

_Fembots..._ She rolled her eyes as she stuck up her hand. "I am."

The other maids just glared at her, longing to be in her position.

_Suckers..._

It was actually her second time serving Sasuke. And in truth, the first time did not go well. Sasuke had a cold at that time and accidentally sneezed spaghetti onto her white apron. Not that she cared about her uniform or anything but talk about all the Uchiha boogers...sick. But back to the present, she wasn't really sure if she liked watching the fembots priceless reactions as she stand beside Sasuke better or the plain fact of just standing by Sasuke itself.

Nonetheless, she went into the kitchen and grabbed a plait of roasted steak with red wine and pepper sauce. Her mouth watered as she looked at the large first class American steak. _A bite won't hurt..._she thought deviously. _No Sakura NO! Don't fall into the steak's temptation! You'll lose your job! You'll lose your education! You'll lose daddy's hope!..._

Inner Sakura: Fine! I'll just watch Sasuke contently eating this piece of steak. Hmph...

By the time she got out, she saw that Sasuke was patiently waiting in his wooden chair. She gently placed the plate in front of him and stood there glaring at him. _What the heck?! Not even a glance?! _She growled in her mind. _What a rude jerk. No thank you, no nothing! Why didn't I eat the steak?! _

Sasuke started cutting his steak and Sakura watched as all the juice came out from the piece of meat. She was surprised Sasuke actually acted like a gentlemen when it came to eating. She always imagined him to be a pig after the first incident. _He's still a very RUDE jerk nevertheless..._she thought and wondered if he'll remember her from the cellar incident when he sees her. Only one way to find out...

Sakura polished her number tag while daringly walked around the large dining table and knocked over a clean plate that was sitting on the table. "OOPS! Excuse me..." She said loudly and picked up the plate while standing upright and facing Sasuke. She made sure her number tag shined like the sun and was clearly visible to him. To her success, Sasuke did look up and stared at her _gleaming _number tag.

Inner Sakura: Hell yeah!

She watched eagerly as Sasuke stared at her number tag. _What will happen next?_ she wondered. Will he fire her when he remembers the cellar incident? Will he say something to her? Will he-

look down and continue on with his food like nothing had happened.

_WHAT THE?! _Sakura stared at him with a slight gaping jaw. _Did he just go back eating that piece of yummy yummy steak?! _

Was she THAT invisible?! Did she look THAT ugly with a wig on? Come on!!

_Thanks for not remembering jerkwad..._ she sniffed. It wasn't that she's sad Sasuke didn't notice her but the fact that he didn't remember her after such an incident was depressing. _Great...it's nice not being noticed..._

No one can blame her though. People generally wanted to be remembered or receive some kind of attention in their lifetime and Sakura was one of them. The only people that really noticed her in her life were her dad, her mom, Ino, and Banana. _Wow...such a huge list..._

Sakura sighed and went back to Sasuke's side. She guess she couldn't expect so much from someone like him. Their status had such a huge anyway. She cleared her head from further thoughts and focused her gaze at a flower painting on the wall. It was better than staring at Sasuke's steak.

_Let's see...dishes after this...laundry after that...kill me. _

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**Starry Starry Night**

Sakura hulled a large barrel of clothes as she went into the Uchiha laundry room. It was a pretty big room that contained at least ten washing machines and fifteen dryers. She unloaded the clothes carelessly and threw each of them inside the machine- twenty-five uniforms each. Her hands ached from scrubbing the dishes, but at least she got the job done without Mina around.

Inner Sakura: This is SO boring...

She watched dully as she threw twenty-five of the SAME outfits into the SAME washing machine. If she was the owner of the mansion, she would totally get ten different washing machines and 254 different maid uniforms. Everything was black, white, or blue in the mansion. But just then, something caught her eye. Even though it was frickin' black.

"Huh? What's this?" She looked with wonder at the piece of clothing she was holding. It didn't look like a skirt or an apron. Sakura carefully smoothed out the scrunched up clothing that had been crushed under the pile of uniforms and felt her eyes widen into saucer plates. "WHAT THE FRICKING GOD?!"

It was...

It was...

It was...

It was goddamn Chicken-Hair's boxers!

"EWWW!!" She squirmed at first reaction and threw the clothing away from her as far as possible. "Cooties!! Ewww...I just touched Sasuke's boxers!"

She needed soap. Fast.

But wait.

Before she made a run for soap, she peered over the barrel of clothes and to her horror; it contained MORE of Sasuke's IDENTICAL black boxers.

Why are Sasuke's boxers the same?! If she was him, she would so get rainbow boxers. Black boxers? Boring much.

"I should get him pink boxers." She couldn't help but giggle.

"Excuse me?"

Sakura froze as she heard a cocky sarcastic voice behind her. _Shit..._

"Ehehehe..." She turned around and scratched her head but immediately stopped herself when she remembered it had Sasuke-chicken-germs on it. Who knows...she might get bird flu from it.

Sasuke on the other hand was staring at her with a dumbfounded gaze and a raised eyebrow.

"I was just...uhh...talking to myself sir." Sakura explained.

Sasuke nodded sarcastically and looked at his boxer that was at least three meters away from where she was standing. Did he just see this unattractive maid of his _throw_ his boxers on the ground while commenting on how she might get cooties from it and say that she should get a _pink_ boxer for him?

He stared at her number tag and read the number.

**Number 167**

"I'm sorry sir." Sakura said quickly and picked up the boxers much to her disgust.

"You're that maid who pushed me in the cellar." He recalled calmly.

_Damn...he remembered..._

Inner Sakura: Yay, he remembered! I'm actually being noticed by something err...someone...no wait...yeah...something. Hehe...he's the fifth person too.

"I'm sorry about that too sir." She winced but looked at him curiously as a gradual smirk played on his lips. _What? _

"NUMBER 167!! WHAT IS THIS?! WHAT IS THIS?!" Someone screeched.

They turned around instantly and found Mina by the doorway. Her chestnut hair was practically standing up in everyway. _Woot! Here come's the female version of Albert Einstein! _Sakura irresistibly thought. However, each of Mina's gradual stomps made her wince even more.

"I THOUGHT I COULD GET MY EYES OFF OF YOU BUT NOW...I SEE YOU TALKING WITH MASTER SASUKE! WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!! HOW COLD YOU BE SO UNGRATEFUL?!"

"I can explain Miss. Number 1." Sakura started and gulped.

_I am going to lose my job...I am SO going to lose my job...daddy, I'm sorry..._

"I DON'T NEED YOUR EXPLANATION!" Mina shouted angrily and grabbed her hair. "GET OUT OF MY SIGHT NOW! I WILL DEAL WITH YOUR PUNISHMENT LATER. NO FOOD FOR YOU TOMORROW!"

"Ack...NOT the hair!!" Sakura shouted. But it was too late. Mina had attempted to fling her aside but only succeeded in flinging her wig instead.

"WHAT?!" She shreaked in horror as long eccentric pink hair flowed down from Sakura's head and onto her back.

Sasuke felt his mouth drop wide open as his "unattractive" maid clutched her hair desperately and tried to hide it.

_Shit..._Sakura thought and felt hot tears welling in her eyes.

**Fin **

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**Holy frick, I wrote this chapter exactly a year ago haha. How sweet is that? But anyways, at the time, I was in LA living at a relative's house and their computer was frickin crappy so I apologize for any past spelling and grammar errors since the only writing tool I had was WordPad. Well, after this re-edit, the spelling errors are gone but there are still some grammar germs out there so please bear with me. **

**But anyways, MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE from 2007 and 2008!!!!**

**Lots of loves!! Ciao!!**

Re-posted on December 25, 2008


	3. His: Barbie

**Heyo fellow prisoners. Some people have been asking me why I chose 167 for Sakura…****Well…at first, I wanted a four in it since four is such a cool number XD On top of it all, it needed to be in the hundreds because this shows that Sakura is one of the newer employees. However, four didn't seem right so I settled with a six. And as for seven…well everyone likes seven tehee... **

**Further more, get this! If you break up the number 167 and put it in an equation, it will be like: 1 plus 6 equals 7. How cool! **

–**Does the Gai Pose- **

**Readers: Ewwww…… **

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"That's enough."

"YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING BRA-"

"I said THAT'S ENOUGH." Sasuke demanded loudly yet keeping his cool at the same time.

"HOW COULD Y-...What?" Mina eyes widened and stared at her beloved master in shock.

Sakura furiously wiped her tears away and looked at Sasuke, who had also shocked her as well. Anyhow, that bastard was not going to see her cry. He will never see it as long as she lives.

"Mina, go back to your room. It's late." Sasuke ordered calmly and did something that blew Sakura away. He grabbed her hand.

She flinched violently but he held on and started to lead her out of the room. Mina looked like she was about to kill someone but was too lost for words and just stared dumbly as Sasuke led her out.

_I'm going to get cooties for sure…_ Sakura glared at the link that her boss had so smoothly created. His hands felt oddly soft which made her even angrier. Clearly, this guy never really worked in his life so there wasn't even a slight hint of calluses forming. On a side note, her heart pumped faster too. It was her first time having such an intimate contact with a person of the opposite sex and she was downright nervous. Is he going to rape her? She was too young to be raped! How old is he?

Eighteen

_He's too young to rape someone!! _She reasoned but started to slightly panic nonetheless. _Aack!! He's leading me to his room! What do I do?! What do I do?! This is bad!_

True enough, Sasuke led his servant to his room and propped her up onto his roly-poly chair. And mind you, Sasuke is known for being a seducer. He smirked slightly as he patiently waited for the servant to digest his room. Oh, he knew it was grand alright.

Sakura's jaws dropped at least a meter down despite her will. The dick-head's room was fricken big. It was at least twice as big as her family restaurant. The wall was lined with rich blue paint and covered with all kinds of car model posters. Over to the far left was a mini basketball court that's at least half the size of a real half court.

Beside the gleaming polished court were three black couches with a fifty-five inches plasma TV that was equipped with a full sound system in front of it. Nearby the TV was a set of mahogany drawers; a king-size bed laid directly the opposite of it. A long wooden desk sat beside the drawer with a latest high-tech computer resting on it. The entrance of the room was across the desk and to finish off the grand room, a huge window/entrance to an ivory balcony was built beside the desk.

_My god…..these rich bastards!!..._

She had never came to his room before. All the maids were always fighting over who gets to clean his room and so forth so she volunteered to drop out of the game which they gladly complied.

"Yo."

Sakura snapped her head back into its place and looked at the guy in front of her. She was very nervous and couldn't help but gulp. She hoped her boss wouldn't rape her. He was being so damn close to her- closer than he should've been. Her short maid skirt just made the situation even more uncomfortable.

Inner Sakura: Get out of my personal bubble!! Shoo!!!

Sasuke, who of course, couldn't hear her, only came closer to looked at her with an amused seductive smile, "What's your name?"

"...Number 167 sir." She replied slowly.

"No," He scowled. "I meant your real name."

Sakura hesitated and eyed him suspiciously. What game was he trying to play? "Sakura sir."

"Just Sakura?" He pressed coolly.

"Haruno Sakura sir." She corrected herself unwillingly. Her voice was pretty stable in contrast to her emotions inside. At least that meant she was in control.

"Haruno Sakura…" Sasuke repeated thoughtfully and grinned which made her back straighten a little bit more. "How old are you?"

"Seventeen."

"Oh? A girl like you should be a student in school." He inquired and observed the servant closely. He wondered why she wasn't blushing.

Inner Sakura: Cheh, unlike you rich faggots, I don't have enough money to go to the school my dad wants me to go.

"A lot of maids in the mansion are around my age sir. And they're not at school." She answered innocently and squeezed the hem of her skirt hoping to transfer out all the nervousness.

_Cute…and crafty..._ he chuckled in his mind and let his eyes wonder off to her hair. It looked so natural. He paused for a moment before going on as a playful thought crossed his mind. "Pink hair…" he loosely twisted a strand around his fingers. "That's pretty uncommon."

Inner Sakura: This guy... is bursting my bubble!!

"Um…I guess. I got it from my mom." She answered and tightened her grip even more on her skirt. _Don't blush! Don't blush! Don't you dare blush!!_ She was starting to feel really uncomfortable and wished he would just stop playing with her hair. They were sensitive even though they don't have a nervous system. Luckily for her, Sasuke did stop and propped both of his elbows beside her legs and rested his head on top of his palms. He had a look of satisfaction on his smooth flawless face.

"..."

_What now? _She wondered. Sasuke somehow stopped his questioning and looked directly at her. Sakura happened to also find herself daringly staring back quietly which by mistake just made him even more curious.

_This girl…_he thought staring into her eyes. They were cold and still much like his but more larger and vivid. _She's nervous but not because she's attracted…_

"You don't like me do you?" He asked bluntly which made her eyes widen in surprise.

"I-"

He smirked and continued locking her gaze with his own. He was right. The girl had no interest in him whatsoever. Very interesting… "I won't hurt you nor will I fire you, you know? Come on, tell me why?"

_What the hell is he doing?! _Sakura screamed in her mind. This just has to be a trick question. She had just about enough with his mind games. _What do you want from me?!_

"Hn…" He stood up much to her relief when he received no answer. However, she let out her sigh of relief a little bit too fast for she froze as soon as a finger smoothly brushed across the bottom of her chin suggestively. "You're an interesting one."

Sakura just stared at him with a dumbstrucked face. Did he just present her another act of intimacy?! They don't even know each other yet and he thinks he could touch her however he wants?! Hell, this was only her second (techinically) time conversing to him! _That's it!! My personal bubble has been violated long enough!! _

"W-W-WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!!" She stood up furiously and glared at him. "If you think that playboy act can work on me, you're wrong Uchiha!! Unfortunately for you, I'm not like your other dumb maids where you can exercise your mouth on everyday!!"

Inner Sakura: Lowlife! Lowlife!

"I can't believe this! Your maids must have IQ lower than zero to fall in_ love_ with a jerk like you!" Sakura fumed but then stopped as soon as she realized what she said. She had just blown up in front of her boss! _Crap…not again…_

"..."

To make things worse, Sasuke had this blank silent look too…and she did not like it one bit. It was like history repeating itself, except it was recycling all in one day.

"..."

_What now? I'm toast? I wonder what he's thinking! That face is so emotionless!!_

They looked at each other blandly and stood there for at least ten minute in silence (according to Sakura's brain). But really, it was actually only a minute.

"Pfft…hahahahaha…"

"W-What?!" Sakura raised an eyebrow in surprise. "W-What's so funny?!"

For all she knew, she had just cursed him and dissed him in everyway imaginable. Ok, not everyway imaginable but she knew she had cursed him to a certain extent.

Sasuke on the other hand didn't care and continued laughing which made Sakura even more confused. First, she didn't know that the icy lecher was capable of laughing. Second, she had never seen the icy lecher laugh except for evil dark smirks and grins. Correction: Super evil evil dark dark smirks and grins. Third, oh-my-god, he was laughing at someone like her!

He slowly made his way up to her and grabbed the back of her hair gently making her face upward towards him. "You're an interesting one." He commented in a low dominating voice and grinned darkly while leaning down so that their nose just slightly touched. He could literally feel the fear and shock from the powerless girl in his grasp and he loved the feeling.

"I…"

"Hn?" Sasuke tilted his head in an sly innocent manner and urged her on.

"I…can't do this." Sakura muttered bravely under her breath and pushed her boss aside which he willingly complied. "I won't become your toy Uchiha."

Sasuke just stuffed his hands inside his pockets and watched casually as his servant rushed out with a bright red face. "Hn…she finally blushed." He sat down on his bed and reflected on what just happened.

Sakura was it…?

She looked like an average girl with no striking curves. But her weird colour hair and tough attitude made her an entertaining subject. Already, plans were starting to fill up his mind for the little destined girl that was only known as 167 by others.

Sakura it was…

"Haruno…you're mine."

_Then…it is decided…_

She will be his next toy and possibly... maybe even get upgraded into being his teddy bear. Who knows? However, for now, Haruno Sakura had officially become his next barbie.

**Fin **

* * *

**Basically, news from last year is I'm re-editing Enemies to Couples. I already got some start on it but it might take a while for me to finish. Sorry about that ehehehe… **

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	4. Bitch Number One

**Alright, this is the chapter where I'll start inserting random 'eye-catches' which I haven't done for ages. Enjoy enjoy.**

**Warning: Language as always. Sigh...I really need to work on my potty-mouth. **

* * *

YOO! The new and improved eyecatch is here! I present thee... I-catch! The latest unofficial cousin of ipods but still highly entertaining to one's eye! –Cough- It's going to be a little different than the other I-catches because it's going to be a mini-story itself! Unless a new version is published!

**I-Catch v.1**: A pink haired rebel stood high and almighty in front of her mirror and smiled at her reflection, shouting: I. AM. LEGEND!

Credit: Will Smith

* * *

**B**

**I**

**T**

**C**

**H**

**N U M B E R O N E**

"That stinkin no good Uchiha..." Sakura growled trying to blow off all the heat from her face. First off, Sasuke had invaded her air bubble. Second, he officially popped it! And third, he isolated her off from fresh air while she was in his room. That he-bitch...

_Knock! Knock! _

"Sakura, it's me!" Banana called from behind her bedroom door.

Sakura jumped and quickly wrapped a towel around her head to prevent the girl from seeing her real hair.

"Wow, you're all red." Banana commented as she opened the door with a nervous smile.

"Haha, really? Yeah, I thought it was a little hot in here. Whew, I think I'm going to the bathroom to take a cold shower." She said quickly, holding the big turban on her head securely.

"But it's almost twelve." The plain girl noted and adjusted her black oval glasses.

"That makes it all the more reason to go! Byee!" She chuckled nervously, grabbed her clothes, and darted out of the room. Since they were all divided into sections, each section had to share a bathroom of their own. Fortunately for her, no one was using the bathroom and everyone was probably asleep so she had it all to herself.

After finishing the longest shower ever in history, she slowly peered out of the hallway and sighed happily when she found it empty. Not for a lookout for peeping toms though, since the maid sect only ever had females walking around. So during shower hours, one could see a lot of women clad in only a thin white towel walking around in the hallway. It's a guy's heaven of course.

Anyways, Sakura hurried over to her room and quietly stepped in. As expected, Banana was already sound asleep in her bed which made her free to do anything she wanted. During these times, it was normally her study hours but today, because of that damn chicken and bitch number 1, she had a more important thing to accomplish.

Sakura hated her next actions but she had to do it no matter what. Slowly and painstakingly, she pulled out her wallet from her little hoard of treasures in her small closet and sneaked out of the mansion. Mina was just as hateful as Sasuke was. Maybe even more distasteful. If she hadn't ruined her wig, she wouldn't have to spend her salary to buy a new one.

"Alright, the coast is clear." She whispered to herself as she went to the only window that doesn't set off the security alarm in the west wing. Only a few people know about the window and the only reason why she found out about it was because she saw Sasuke sneak out of it once when she crept downstairs to get a drink. It was against the policy to go out after curfew but it was urgent for her. So far, she had only used the window twice. If anyone was to blame it should be Mina.

Little by little, she opened the glass window with great care and crawled over it as quietly as she could. Even though she knew the window didn't set off the alarm, she was still paranoid and listened intently to any noises inside the building. _Good...no alarm, I'm saf- _She froze.

"Well, well...you know about this window too huh."

_Damnit...I curse my luck..._

"Because I saw you climbing out of it once _sir_." She replied tersely and looked at Sasuke who was by the window doing who-knows-what. However, judging by his attire, she expected that he was just about to set out to meet another girl. Sasuke had an unbuttoned shirt on which revealed his 'sexy' abs and a pair of black loose shorts. It was simple but very suggestive.

_Whoever he's meeting is truly dense..._she thought, fixing her eyes on only his head. His body sure was distracting...

"You weren't stalking me by any chance now were you?" He inquired teasingly.

"N-No." She replied hastily in surprise and avoided his gaze.

"Hn..." Sasuke crossed his arms and contemplated for a moment. "You know, I can get you fired. You broke a lot of rules today Haruno."

Sakura stiffened when she heard her name. It would be nice if he called her by her first name properly.

"Let's see," He counted playfully, "Out of bed after curfew, mishandling your boss's property, commenting bad things behind your boss's back, talking back at your boss, and making the head maid pissed."

"Are you going to fire me?"

Sasuke smiled slightly and looked at her with a few dark evocative glints in his eyes. "Do you want me to?"

_Aargh...why is he so good with words?! Always catching me off guard like that..._

"N-No."

"Heh... so I won't." He shrugged which made Sakura sort of taken aback. "Where are you going?"

"To a store."

"Shopping? This late?"

"Yess." Sakura gritted her teeth.

"Alright, I guess I'll go with you."

"What?!"

"You heard me Haruno." Sasuke smirked coolly.

"B-But you can't!"

"Is that an order?" He raised an eyebrow.

"N-No!" Sakura tried not to growl and glare at him. Sasuke just kept that dignified smirk of his and followed her. _Why can't he just follow some other girl and make her dreams come true?! _She asked angrily in her mind. Sasuke was really the total opposite of what she first imagined him to be.

When she saw Sasuke for the first time, she thought he was a quiet reserved person and she instantly got attracted to him. But who knew in that fateful month, she caught Sasuke making out with another maid in her section. After that, she caught Sasuke playing with different girls each time and found out just how manipulative he could be with that tongue of his.

"Aren't you meeting with someone?" She asked out of annoyance.

Inner Sakura: Like meeting a whore!

Maybe she could shake him off by annoying him. His presence beside her only made the atmosphere tense.

Sasuke clicked his tongue lightly for a second before replying casually. "Nahh, they could wait and play without me."

Sakura's jaw almost dropped. _They?! Play?! _

Inner Sakura: Dude?! How many vaginas do you have to enter until you're satisfied?!

"I mean, it's only basketball." Sasuke finished.

She cast him a shocked look before cranking her head forward feeling extremely stupid. Of course! He meant basketball! _But still...that doesn't mean he's clean...whatever...yeah yeah, he's a playboy and I still don't trust him..._

"You seemed shocked by my response." Sasuke smirked. "How's that?"

Sakura looked at him tilting his head to one side like an innocent little boy which he was far from his actual evil self. _Psh..._she thought he knew that she wasn't interested in him so _why_ is he even talking to her right now?!

Inner Sakura: Hello? Earth to Uchiha and that brain of yours that's only filled with sex positions! Take a hint!

"You thought I was going to meet a girl didn't you?"

_Damnit… _Sakura cast her head aside and gritted her teeth. Who knew chickens could read minds.

"That hurt." He commented playfully, stuffing his hands inside his pockets.

She forcefully closed her jaws and swallowed her saliva with difficulty. They were almost at the convenience store which was the only store that was still open around midnight. The faster she finds a wig, the faster she could get out of the place. "You can't blame me for thinking that way." She muttered and continued walking.

"True." Sasuke said thoughtfully surprising her once again.

"Then why do you do it?" She blurted without thinking.

She couldn't believe Sasuke actually paused for a minute to think before replying. Maybe he really had a good reason…

"Because, I think its fun."

-Shatters-

Sakura suddenly felt this unexpected hope inside her drop down to hell as if it could never be retrieved again. She didn't know why she expected a decent answer from him so much. Or why she even bothered expecting or hoping at all. His answer in the end was none other than a typical one from a playboy like him.

_Chickens...they never fail to surprise me..._

They arrived at the convenience store and Sakura immediately began searching for a wig. She knew it was ridiculous to ask for a wig from a convenience store but she had to try. Sasuke followed behind his maid closely and noticed the cashier was a guy. It was no surprise to him that the guy was gawking at Sakura's pink hair with wide eyes. However, with one of his famous Uchiha glare, the cashier nervously looked away. It wasn't a possessive glare or anything like that, but it was piercing enough to make the guy gulp in fear.

"Found it!" Sakura cried happily in amazement as she found a short black wig from a rack.

"A wig?" Sasuke looked at her questionably. It was his turn to be surprised.

"Yes." She replied and pointed at her hair. "You don't expect me to walk around like this tomorrow do you?"

He stared at her for a long time as a little bright light bulb started forming on top of his head. "What if I said yes?" His lips curved into a grin.

Sakura looked at him in horror and found herself completely speechless. She should've just ran away from him the moment she saw him by the window.

_What if I said yes?... _

_What if I said yes?..._

His words echoed in her mind over and over again until her mind went completely blank. How she hated the evilness behind the grin of those lips.

_God, can I chop this chicken's head off and cook him for tomorrow's stew? Chicken noodle soup...my favourite..._

The answer from heaven's above:

Blank.

_Amen. _

Mina hesitantly yet excitedly knocked on her beloved master's door. She hoped Sasuke stilled favoured her as his favourite maid. Hearing no reply, she smiled crazily to herself and fumbled around her chain of keys to every room in the mansion. As head maid, she had been presented with handling the important task of keeping the keys safe.

It was early in the morning and she knew that Sasuke was still asleep. But she had something 'urgent' to tell him even though she didn't like the news one bit. Still, she twisted the ten karat golden key in the silver knob and gently pushed the door open. To see her master's sleeping face was absolutely heavenly delicious. She knew that Sasuke had a nasty morning temper if he didn't get his sleep but again…the matter was 'urgent'.

Plus, she wouldn't mind being a stress toy of his where he can blow off his anger every time. She gladly accepted anything that allowed her to spend more time with him. Mina crept closer with pure joy as she saw Sasuke comfortably sleeping on his bed...shirtless. She took a long while savoring every yummy data and dreamt of having raw sex with that hot body of his one day.

Mina then shook her head quickly and remembered what she was here for again. She called out her favourite name loudly and saw that cute perfect face of his stir. Daringly, she outstretched her hands and touched that smooth skin of his to shake him awake. However, her mind instantly went off tangent again as she dreamed of wild ecstasy and remembered their first real make-out.

Mina licked her lips and felt a little bit wet; just wishing she could taste those lips of young master's again. She knew Sasuke was just playing around her at that time, but she felt something special firing inside her and she was sure Sasuke could feel it too if he searched hard enough.

"What is it?" Sasuke mumbled coldly and pulled his hand away from her.

Mina felt a twinge of disappointment by this but answered anyway. Even though they were drifting farther and farther apart, she still believed Sasuke had feelings for her. It hurt her to see him making out with other maids months after months but she refused to believe that Sasuke really liked any of them.

Their kiss didn't last as long as theirs did.

They didn't make-out as much as they did.

But mostly, he didn't praise them or tell them how much he liked them.

_You're a pretty good kisser...want to be my head maid?_ He teased her as they kissed a long time ago. She couldn't tell him how happy she was at the time. But then, weeks after, Sasuke started to distance himself and go off playing with other girls. Anyways, he wasn't as passionate about them as he was to _her..._and she will always hold that fact deep inside her heart.

"Master Sasuke," She bit her lips, hating the next few words that were about to come out of her mouth. "Miss. Karin called and she's coming for a visit."

Sakura rolled around groggily with her eyelids still tightly shut. A thick blanket covered her whole body and head making the sleep comfortably warm. But something still wasn't quite right. She wanted to sleep in a little bit more but she suddenly had this gut feeling that she was late for work. Wasn't Banana supposed to wake her up?

"Sakura..."

_Finally..._she thought. So she was still on time for work but how come this bad feeling still lulled around?

"Sakura wake up." Banana called again.

"Mmnn..." She stretched a little under her bed and wondered why Banana was so stoic today. Normally, she was either cheerful or hyperactive when she woke her up.

"Thanks Nana," Sakura yawned, pushing her covers off and got ready for work like every other day.

"Saku-you..."

"Yeah?" She turned around meeting a gaping Banana who was pointing at her and had abnormally large eyes behind her glasses. She was confused at first and shot back a confused look at the girl but then slowly remembered what happened the day before. "Oh...umm..."

"You-"

"Yeah err...Nana, I've been wearing a wig all this time you see... and um...this is my true hair colour... I hope I didn't freak you out?" Sakura chuckled nervously and mentally slapped her forehead. Of course she was freaked out!

"..."

"A lot of things happened yesterday-"

"Right." Banana cut her off shocking Sakura. "A of things happened yesterday. I think..." She paused to choose the right words, carefully avoiding her roommate's gaze. "I need sometime alone to think."

With that, the red-head quickly exited the room leaving Sakura clueless and stunned.

Inner Sakura: What just happened?

"Did Nana just walk out on me?" Sakura asked herself disbelievingly. She knew pink-hair wasn't exactly normal but did it freak her out that much? Nana didn't seem like those types to judge people by their looks. She shook her head hoping it might get rid of all the thoughts that are suddenly flooding in and got dressed. Something clearly was up.

As she walked to the bulletin board to find out what her daily job was she couldn't help but notice all the stares she got from everyone. It was all because of that stupid chicken... after Sasuke found out about the wig, he forced her not to buy it and escorted her immediately back to the mansion. Afterwards, she thought he was going to do something to her again but Sasuke just ordered her to go to sleep and said nothing more. She thought it was weird but didn't say much back because she was so mad at him.

And now... the moment that she had been dreading ever since she came to the mansion has come. Total humiliation. _Think on the bright side... your social status was low ever since you came here so it can't get any lower than this right? _

_-_

"Look, the bitch number one is here."

-

-

_WHAT?! _Sakura immediately snapped her head towards the source of the voice and saw a maid she hadn't seen before glaring at her straight on. Ok...so her hair colour was weird, she knew that. But what did she do to get labeled as bitch number one? She could totally understand _freak_ but bitch? _I'm the bitch?_ Mina was supposed to be the bitch!

-

-

-

"Oh my god?! Did she go dye her hair?"

"I totally bet she did...psh...how shallow...wanting to get attention."

"Such a total bitch."

-

-

-

Sakura forcefully cranked her head back into her place and walked hastily to the board. _So I'm the bitch because of that chicken?! _She wanted to growl and punch those maids who were purposely talking in a loud voice so that she could hear them.

Oh, add Uchiha Fuckface into that punching list too...

_Chill...chill..._

Inner Sakura: How can I be chill?!

_Just concentrate on your job! _

She quickly found her name on the board and ran her fingers across the list of chores she had to do.

_Maid 167 – Polish the dining room, sweep the west garden, and pluck weeds. _

Sakura sighed but was half relieved that a part of her work was outdoors. Maybe she'll get fewer stares there. But now readers, you see... if Sakura really did get those chores, she would've been in Lalaland already. And we know that Sakura clearly wasn't in Lalaland. So Sakura reread her chores for the day again because maids sometimes misread their jobs.

_You're too kind God. _She thought sarcastically finding out she had indeed read the wrong line and the job that she thought she had, belonged to Maid 168. Thus, she repeated the process.

_Maid 167 – Wash the family room hall, wipe Uchiha Madame's China collection, and clean the cellar. _

And readers, if Sakura really did get those job she would've been in heaven already. But we also know that she couldn't be in heaven either because she's obviously alive.

Not wanting to misread again, she read it once more.

"What is wrong with me? Why can't I read properly today?" She growled under her breath and placed her index finger under Maid 167. Once, She had accidentally did another's maids job and got her salary deducted in half. She sure learned her lesson. It was a maid's responsibility to know what her job is and the Uchiha household will not allow such a mistake because it decreases the efficiency of workers.

"Maid 167..." She read with extra care. "Ma-WHAT?!"

She wasn't hallucinating this time.

She wasn't dreaming either.

Nor was she mistaken again.

And she _definitely_ wasn't in Lalaland.

"Maid 167 – Master Sasuke's PERSONAL SERVANT? For...for...UNTIL HE SAYS SO?! What the fucken shitty hell?"

Sadly, dear readers once again. Little Sakura was mistaken because this wasn't hell. Because if it was, Satan would be there and everyone would have this arrow-shaped tail sticking out of their butthole. No readers, this is Earth we're talking about and things on Earth don't always go heavenly or lala-ly or according to plan. And since this is Earth, life on the planet was cruel.

Too cruel.

On top of the list, Sakura read in horror and wondered why she never noticed it in the first place. It read:

Miss. Karin is coming this afternoon. (In big bold red font) Will the personal servant please report to Master Sasuke. A.S.A.P.

Sakura's heart really smashed into pieces this time.

Behold!

Miss. Karin

Alia: Sasuke's girlfriend.

Other alias: The Ultimate Bitch Number One

**Fin **

* * *

**I thought this chapter was pretty long and cliché-ish. Sorry about that. Anyway, this chapter was updated for Valentines day so Happy 2007 Valentines! Lotsa Lurv! **

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	5. Her: Puking Star

**Heyo fellow prisoners. Much love and thanks. In addition, I think it's time to introduce our sweet superstar, Ino. She will be popping in and out from time to time. **

* * *

**I-Catch v.1-2: **_"Sakura, get down for breakfast! You're almost late for school!" _Her mother called.

"_I. AM. LEGEND!"_ The rebel shouted.

"_What do you mean you're a legend?! I. AM. YO. MAMMA! Get down here this instant Haruno Sakura!" _

"_Ok, fine fine…"_

* * *

- xXx -

"So he made you his personal maid?!" Ino laughed over the phone.

"YEAH! Can you believe that?"

"Oooo…I'm sensing some looov-"

"Shut up pig."

- xXx -

* * *

**H**

**E**

**R**

**P U K I N G - S T A R**

"U. C. H. I. H. A. S. A. S. U. K. E." Sakura hissed, kicking her master's door open in her infamous unlady 'ahem' like manner.

"Nice underwear." Sasuke commented and grinned. "Although, haven't you learned to knock first?"

"Knocking my pretty ass! If you think I have no manners than that makes you… a-an even less mannered person! Making me your personal servant?! Ha! What the hell? Are you out of your mind?!" She cried loudly, ignoring the underwear comment. Hopefully, it will inspire him to wear underwear other than black.

"Not really." He replied casually and played with a basketball in his hands. "Get me some juice."

"WHAT?!"

"I said get me some juice."

"What did you say?!"

"Get. Me. Some. Juice."

"HUH?!"

"JUICE DAMNIT!"

"FINE!"

"Fine!"

"FINE!"

"Fine!"

"FINE!" She growled loudly and stomped out to the kitchen. _He wants juice?! I'll give him some juice! I'll be the worst personal servant he will ever EVER have! _

"Chef, the boss wants some juice." She demanded angry and glared at the other maids who were also throwing imaginary daggers at her. "I didn't ask for this ok? So turn those heads around and get back to work!"

The other maids just stared at her with wide eyes and dropped their jaws. The nerve of her! First she took their beloved master and now she's being cocky about it. That pink-haired biotch! Sakura just rolled her eyes angrily in response and tapped her foot impatiently. She was too angry to care about what others think of her at the moment.

"What kind of juice does he want? Apple? Orange? Cranberry? Kiwi? Pineapple? Raspberry? Grapes? Tomato?" The chef asked with great impatience too.

Sakura thought for a moment. _Brain juice would be nice... maybe with poison too? _

Sasuke didn't exactly tell her what he wanted… which meant she could pick any she wanted! Oh happy day! Should she choose unpredictable cranberry? Crazy kiwi? Or old school apple juice just in case he doesn't like the others? No… she'll pick the worst kind of juice possible. After all, she _was_ going to be his worst personal maid in history.

"I'll take tomato please." She smiled sweetly and cackled in the inside. Who in their right mind would _like_ tomato juice?! Happily, she skipped her way back to Sasuke's room with a glass of deep red tomato juice in hand.

Inner Sakura: Happy drinking mwahahahaha…

"Your juice." She forced a smile on her lips and handed the man his drink. She could imagine it now.

Sasuke spits out his drink on his high class bed sheets and go, '_WHAT?! What is this hideous thing? It burnt my tongue!_' And she will go, '_Why, it's you're juice sir._' And he will go, '_Ugh, I hate tomatoes! You just ruined my taste buds!_' And she will go, '_Too bad sir. You didn't tell me what you specifically wanted so it's not my fault. IN YOUR FACE ASSHOLE!_'

"Thanks. How did you know I like tomatoes?"

_WHATTTTTTT? _Sakura felt her lower jaws disconnect with her upper one. "Y-You like it?"

"No, I hate tomatoes." He replied sarcastically and tossed his basketball aside which landed perfectly into the net with a _swoosh_!

_Damnit! Mission failed! _She bit her shirt angrily and glared at him. "Sir, can't you tell that I don't like y-"

"Get me some crackers."

A vein popped on her forehead. _This bastard…So it finally comes down to this huh?! Well bring it hubba! You're going to answer my questions no matter what! _

She quickly raced downstairs, got a whole plate of assorted crackers, and shoved it against him. "Your crackers! Now, why did you pick me as your person-"

"Get me my cell phone. It's in the family room."

_Gahh! _

"Your cell phone! What the hell is up with-"

"Get me a sandwich."

-Twitch-

"Your fricken sandwich. Why-"

"Get me some water."

_Why can't you just be anorexic and not drink or eat anything..._

"...-pants- ...-pants-...Your….fuckin….wa…ter…-pants-...How-"

"Bring me my basketball."

"God damnit!" Sakura breathed heavily from running all over the mansion just to fetch him his needs. "I'm not a dog!"

Sasuke just laughed lightly at her collapsed figure beside his bed and grabbed her hair gently from behind, pulling her close. "Of course you're not a dog. You're my personal servant."

Sakura, having no experience in the world of intimate contact, felt her heart beat fast and face go red. Her body quivered slightly but she managed to keep a straight face. "What if I don't want to be your personal servant?"

"Too bad, cuz you're already is." Sasuke smirked letting her go. "Unless you want to quit of course."

Sakura gave her a skirt a tight squeeze before sighing deeply. "No…"

"What's so bad about being my personal servant anyway?" He asked curiously throwing a goldfish cracker into his mouth.

_What's so bad about being your personal servant?! _

Inner Sakura: WHAT'S SO BAD ABOUT BEING YOUR PERSONAL SERVANT?!

"I'll tell you what's bad Uchiha." She spat out and stuck her index finger deep against his chest. "_Every_ maid in your _damn_ mansion wants to kill me now that's what! In addition, I have to personally serve someone like you! If you don't think that's bad, than I don't know what is."

"...If you don't want to be my personal servant then don't be." He shrugged.

"...WHHHAT?!" She exclaimed, throwing her hands up. _Who does he think he is?! _"Then why the hell did you just say all those crap and act like you want me to be your servant? Who am I to you anyway? A dog? What are those maids to yo-"

"Shut up." Sasuke hissed suddenly and covered her mouth tightly.

"Mmmgh!!"

"Stop moving and listen." He ordered, his eyes narrowing, and looked outside his window.

Sakura pulled his hands away from her and blew a wild strand of hair away from her face furiously. However, she didn't say anything and listened. At first she heard nothing and wondered if Sasuke was delusional but then she heard a soft thump outside that sounded like the door of a car closing. Curiously, she climbed on top of Sasuke's bed and crawled beside him to look out the window as well.

Since Sasuke's room was directly facing the gate, she could see a red convertible parked fancily in front of the entrance and a flashy red-head strutting towards them. If the red-head hadn't created such an inerasable image in her head, she would've been marveling at how sharp Sasuke's ears were since she could barely hear the sound from outside at all.

But no, the red-head just had to make herself appear so high and mighty that it was almost comparable to Sasuke's ego which was it scary.

_Karin…_she thought warily. It wasn't her first time meeting her. If fact, Sakura had met her at least ten times and beyond. It's just that in the past, whenever Karin made it her habit to drop by and check up on Sasuke, she had always been assigned to polish the doors which also made 'answering the door' a part of her job as well.

* * *

- xXx -

"So Karin's bitchier than me?" Ino giggled on the phone.

"Shocking isn't it?"

"What does she look like?"

"A star." Sakura replied truthfully.

- xXx -

* * *

_Clop, Clop, Clop_

She watched Karin pull out her red compact powder as she came nearer and nearer. Behind that glossy burgundy hair, those newest Dior shades, that belly revealing black halter top, that custom-made navy jeans, and those super black heels that goes clop clop clop every time she walked – _she knew_ – a dark sinister beast rests within and – _she knew _– the beast was coming.

_Clop, Clop, Clop_

She remembered Karin passing her without a care in the world as she opened the door for her in the past and how she looked at her as if her status was lower than a fat old rat.

_Clop, Clop, Cl-_

"Put this on."

"H-Huh?"

"Do you have hearing problems or something?" Sasuke said impatiently and threw her something silky.

Sakura looked down and gasped. _A-A wig?! _

"B-But why?"

"Just put it on." He replied avoiding her gaze and went out. "I expect you to be at my service as soon as you finish fixing yourself. And fix your hair well."

"Wha-" She stopped midway as Sasuke left before she could even start HER sentence. Sakura furrowed her eyebrows and examined the wig. Was it a trick perhaps? _What was he up to exactly?..._

As time passed, she found herself being more and more confused by Sasuke's contradicting actions. _Does he want me to wear a wig or not?! _

Inner Sakura: Make up your damn mind!

Feeling frustrated, she quickly fixed the long black wig onto her head and erased all the trace of her pink hair. Just when she thought she figured Sasuke all out, he had to surprise her and leave yet another mystery behind.

"Whatever. I will get to the bottom of this." She muttered angrily, exiting out of the room.

Sasuke groaned silently and ran a hand through his hair as he slowly descended down the stairs. Why did Karin have the worst timing ever? Just when he was about to have fun, she always come barging in and being all suggestive with her body.

"Sir, Miss Karen is here." A maid informed and blushed.

"Send her to the lounge. I'll meet her there." He ordered without looking at the maid and wondered what was taking Sakura so long. He had spent his morning trying to find a wig in his house and just when he was about to give up, he found a nice long black one in his mother's drawers.

_She must be so confused and so pissed now…_ He thought with a small grin.

..._but why the hell is she taking so long? _

"Chill." He muttered and forced himself to be patient. _She's probably slow because she's trying to hide her hair…_

She _better_ hid it well though.

Because there was no way he was going to let Karin see it. Na-uh, she wasn't going to take his toy away from him this time.

"Hi Babe." Her feminine voice greeted.

Sakura went downstairs at her own pace, making sure her wig was in place. She didn't know why she bothered so much with the wig or why she was being so obedient, but one thing was for sure. She was hella glad her pink hair was hidden once again.

As she passed her fellow co-workers, they all stared at her in confusion and started whispering amongst themselves wondering if their eyes had gone bad or did Maid 167 really change her hair colour back to black in such a short amount of time.

"Excuse me, where's Master Uchiha?" Sakura asked an incoming butler. There weren't a lot of butlers in the mansion but those that are, were in charge of the chores maids can't do themselves such as repairing or fixing things around the building. She was mighty glad there were butlers in the area for they didn't glare at her or curse at her.

"Young Master is in the lounge." The old butler smiled friendlily.

"Thanks." She smiled back and took her time to get to her destination. She _so _did not want to see Sasuke acting all flirty towards Karin. And sure enough, there Sasuke was, in front of her two green eyes, with an arm relaxing on the couch and curved around Karin's shoulders like they had been couples for life.

_Give me a break…_ She thought with disgust and reported herself in unenthusiastically. "One-Sixty-Seven at your service."

"Sasuke, I want some wine." Karin purred and twirled her shades in her hands as soon as she saw a supposed unimportant girl in an Uchiha servant uniform come towards her.

"Sure." Sasuke shrugged and looked at Sakura like she was some kind of foreign alien monster. "You heard her One-Sixty-Seven."

"Right away sir." Sakura gritted her teeth and forced a smile. _Why? _Her blood boiled as Sasuke continued to act like he didn't know her at all. _What? Are you too ashamed to tell your girlfriend that you're messing with me? _She wanted to shout although she didn't like the sound of it herself. 'Sasuke' plus 'messing with her' just didn't make sense.

"You're maids sure have slow response rates." Karin commented and looked at her with dissatisfaction.

_Fuck you. _Sakura replied through her eyes and stalked away. However, before she did, she caught Sasuke glancing at her with playfulness in his eyes as if telling her that the whole thing was just a sad joke.

"Whatever." She muttered to herself, grabbing a bottle of ice wine. She had concluded that Uchiha Sasuke was a lunatic who couldn't make up his mind on things and she was having problems because she kept on seeing unnecessary things.

"You're wine."

Karin peeled her eyes away from Sasuke with a smile on her lips like she had just heard him say a funny joke. She then frowned as soon as she saw her and gave off the impression that the maid was sending her some kind of curse. "Well? Pour it."

"Gladly." Sakura smiled like a plastic Barbie doll and poured the wine into two glass goblets that she had brought from the kitchen. How did Sasuke even tolerate her?!

_Maybe he can't and that's why he likes hanging around maids so much…_

She paused for a minute to think then shook her head, chuckling quietly to herself. It couldn't be. Karin was a gorgeous chick of every man's dreams. There was no way a playboy like Sasuke would ever get tired of her.

"Sasuke, what is wrong with your maid? She's so _slow_ at doing things and she doesn't even know her manners." The star suddenly complained, tugging his shirt innocently. "Just _look_ at her. She's just standing there doing nothing when she's supposed to give us the wine."

Sasuke did look at her and forced himself not to smirk. Sakura looked pretty good with his mother's black wig on.

"-and what is up with her? Her eyes are green and her hair's black. I've never seen someone like her…does she have some kind of genetic disease?"

Inner Sakura: Genetic disease your ass?! Shut up bitch! I don't have genetic disease!

_Calm down…calm down…calm down…_ She breathed in and out. Now was not the time to blow up. Especially in front of her boss's mistre—girlfriend. But never in _her_ life had she met someone so rude. Hello? Earth to bitch. She was standing right in front of her! Did she really have to spit it all that out at her face?

"My, my, my…I'm sorry Sasuke, but you sure have a sad bunch of maids. Yet then again," Karen smiled and caressed his cheek. "I'm glad because then, no one will have the potential to take you away."

Inner Sakura: No potential? NO POTENTIAL?! Well guess what whore, I see your lover boy with _his_ maids everyday! And sadly for you…HE'S WITH ME right now!

_Cough…in the bad way of course. _She reminded herself and glared at her.

"Aha…it seems like your maid is jealous of us. Well I can't blame her…we are a gorgeous pair." The beast smiled poisonously.

However, the poison was a little too much for Sakura to handle and caused her to accidentally release a very offended expression. Just a tad wee bit though. That is, if you count a lot of facial twitching, a dropped jaw, a raised eyebrown, an 'are you kidding me' look, and a flaring nostril minor expressions. Then yes, it's just a tad wee bit.

"ME?!" She exclaimed incredulously. "Je-"

"One-Sixty-Seven." Sasuke ordered in a serious tone. But it didn't fool her. She could tell he wanted to crack up on the inside. Nonetheless, she immediately shut her mouth and forced another plastic smile upon her face.

"Jesus just wanted me to say, God bless your relationship." She clasped her hand together innocently.

Karin just raised her eyebrow and looked at her as if she was a freak. "Okay…"

Sasuke just forced a light laugh and brought the red-head's face towards him with his hand. "Don't mind her…"

"You're right." She giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck.

Then, their next action made Sakura's jaw drop again. They actually kissed! She couldn't believe they _actually_ kissed.

K. I. S. S. E. D.

And in front of her too! She rubbed her eyes and watched as they continued smooching one minute after. And tenderly too. Tenderly. **Tenderly. **_**Tenderly!!**_

_GET A BLOODY ROOM!! _

This was a public place for goodness sakes! And the sight of them just totally burned her eyes and she screamed loudly in her mind. Sasuke actually had the guts to start make out randomly with girls in front of her. That bastard. She felt a pang of agony inside.

It was weird, because she always knew Sasuke was just playing around with her since she was his toy like the other maids. She _expected_ Sasuke to act this way. What he and Karin are doing at the moment shouldn't be shocking at all. _But why does it fucking hurt so much?! _

Sakura turned her head away and stared at the side walls blankly. She was just a toy in the end - a useless broken toy that nobody notices. It hurts being unnoticed. And JUST when she _was_ being noticed, it turns to be something like-like this.

Someone

Anyone

Ino

God

Just get her out of this hellhole. Please.

* * *

- xXx -

"Karin looks like a star now eh."

"Yeah."

"Look's like you got some tough competition."

"Stop dreaming pig. She can have him for all I care. If Sasuke like's puking stars. Then let him do as he like."

"You'll regret it thoughhh!"

"Think again."

"I already did."

"Damn you."

**Fin**

* * *

**Yup, OOC all the way especially for Karin. But oh well haha…I don't care about Karin. Anyways,**

**-Gasps!-**

**Did I see you drop a review? –Picks it up-**

**Readers: No…we didn't drop any. **

**Well…it wouldn't hurt to drop some now? –Smiles- I got some cookiesss!!**

**Readers: Bribery I say, bribery!**

**But they're chocolate chip cookies!**

**Readers: …Fine. –Takes the cookie- **

**So…review please? xD **

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	6. Genie From Hell

**Heyo fellow prisoners. DAK is having an extremely bad week this week. The worst she had in years. Thank god she has you guys. You guys are the very best. Love you to tears because she knows she can count on you guys to be there when she writes these random stories to escape reality. Thank. You. For being a part of her escape. **

* * *

-

**I-Catch v2.0: **The 'legend' with a customized pink iPod in hand watched a raven-haired spunk and a red-head junk in front of her. In her ears, only the words of Avril rang,

"_Hey, hey, you, you! I don't like you girlfriend! No way, no way, I think you need a new one." _

He looked at the junk, she looked at the spunk… he smiled, she smiled.

"_I think its time for a dump." _

He smiled, she frowned. The legend laughed singing...

-

* * *

**G**

**E**

**N**

**I**

**E**

**G E N I E**

She was _so_ sure the wall she was staring at would melt anytime now. So sure that she would bet her pet rock on it. How long had she been staring at the wall? _Too long_. How long had Sasuke and Karin been kissing? _Too long._

At this rate, both of them will end up having big floppy fish lips when their done. Now there's a sight to see.

"Mmm…Karen.." Sasuke groaned.

Sakura just rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. Oh puh-lease, that was the lamest groan she had _ever_ heard. Was that supposed to be a groan of pleasure or a groan of constipation?... Not that she had any experience in groaning or anything or the sort…anyway mehh, who asked you?

"Karen…stop…" He muttered and growled slightly at his red-head girlfriend, lightly grabbing her hair.

She rolled her eyes again. _Lame! _He sounded as though he was _annoyed _with Karin. As if. Don't tell her _he_ was the God of Sex who every dumb chick begs to kiss. Just listening to him making all those noises turns her off. She bet her pet rock she could at least sound more pleasurable when being kissed than him. –cough-

"S-Sasuke…" Karen whined sexily, nibbling his lower lips and pulled him closer with her slender arms. By now, Sakura wouldn't be surprised if they started doing the actual thing in front her. Of course, she'll be heavily blinded along the way.

"Hey, I said stop."

_Hey, I said stop. _She mimicked mockingly in her head but then widened her eyes slightly, _only_ slightly, when she realized what Sasuke had just said. Either he was seriously bad at expressing his pleasure or he really wasn't feeling any pleasure at all.

_I think I'll pick the latter…I think…_She hesitated as she watched Sasuke forcefully yet gently pushed Karin away from him. Since Sasuke had surprised her so much with his controversial ways, she wasn't sure what she 'should' think or judge around him anymore.

_Okay…he looks pissed…_ Sakura stood there in confusion, attempting to figure out Sasuke's peculiar expression. _So let's see…he starts making out with her and now he's pissed that he's making out with her…how the hell does that work?! I dont' get this chemistry..._

"Hmph." Karin pouted cutely and crossed her arms.

"I just remembered something I need to do." Sasuke answered ambiguously and stood up.

"Aww…what?"

"Homework." He muttered.

"Homework?" Karin echoed and stood up as well, losing her cute act temporarily. "Since _when_ do you do homework?"

Sakura chuckled to herself silently in amusement watching the drama in front of her. _Homework…nice one hahaha…lameee excuse! _

"Since forever." Sasuke rolled his eyes impatiently.

"Like hell."

"I guess you forgotten that I have a father."

Both Karin and Sakura's eyes widened at the cold response.

Inner Sakura: What an interesting thing to say…peculiar…

Karin cleared her throat and chuckled nervously, clasping her hands behind her back resuming to be cute again (and to make her boobs look bigger). "I'm sorry Sasuke, it's just that we never hang out anymore."

Sakura saw Sasuke's eyes relax a little and smirked. "Some other time."

"Fine." Karin answered unwillingly and let Sasuke guide her to the front door. "Give me a call, I'm free anytime babe."

"Hn."

"Byee." She sang and before she left, she gave every maid waiting by the door a glare who glared back. Sakura just stood there as always and pretended to be a tree. Not like she wanted anything to do with the business anyway. The maids who witnessed the little make-out session between their master and the bitch growled and trampled the star to stardust in their minds.

Inner Sakura: Stalkers….

"Thank God…" Sasuke sighed quietly in relief as he closed the door.

_Oh look, he's happy now…_ Sakura analyzed and jot down further notes on Sasuke's behaviors in her mind. He was an interesting psychological specimen to study.

"Yo."

"What?" She replied rudely, giving him a cold eye.

Sasuke just smirked and walked past her. Faster than she can comprehend, he had swiped off her wig in an instant and was already up the stairs. The other maids gasped lightly as pink hair emerged once again. "Get me some juice Haruno and bring it to my room. _Tomato _juice."

_Psh, so the high and mighty Uchiha finally called me by my name. _She thought annoyingly and stomped into the kitchen while glaring at the other maids for staring at her hair.

Inner Sakura: Ex-cuseh me moi, don't you know it's rude to stare at other people?!

* * *

**Master's Bedroom**

"You're juice Mr. Bastard."

Sasuke just shot her an arched eyebrow and took the drink.

Inner Sakura: Be glad I didn't call you Mr. I-Have-Trouble-Expressing-My-Emotions.

"Whatever." He shrugged and got out a huge practically glowing textbook which Sakura immediately realized. It was the same advanced biology book she was studying. (She was a year ahead of the students her age.)

"Whoa, you were telling the truth." She blurted accidentally. She thought he was just lying about the homework to get Karin to go. Looks like she had to reevaluate her little theory of Sasuke actually hates Karin again…

"Seriously, you think too badly of me." Sasuke acted like he was offended. Although...not like he'd ever studied before...It's just that finals were coming up and he thought he better look at the text for the first time that year.

"Hmmm….you _think_?" She answered sarcastically. "You just made me witness that hideous scene of you and your slutty girlfriend making out."

* * *

x-X-x

"Oh my god!! You actually said that to your boss?!" Ino cried out.

"Yeah well I decided to take my chances you know…I can't exactly lie because that scene really _was_ blinding…dude, I would rather watch you immitate Vanilla Ice than witness that again…plus…Sasuke hasn't exactly fired me after all this time now has he?"

"Haha…if you were my maid…instant hell. I still can't believe you said that!"

"Wait wait…listen to what happens next…"

x-X-x

* * *

Sasuke scowled.

_He actually scowled. _She thought in surprise at his reaction.

"You're so annoying." He sighed. Clearly, this girl doesn't know anything about him at all. "Can't you tell I don't like her?"

"Come again?" Sakura stared blankly at him. So her little theory was right after all? _No_..._But Karin is a __**star**__!! _

"Whatever Haruno…now... what's a cholecystokinin again?..." Sasuke muttered to himself as he looked at his textbook and rubbed his temples hoping to recover his memories from class. Sometimes he wished he was born into some other family rather than being some prestigious Uchiha heir. Then he wouldn't have to worry about doing good in school and just flunk everything. On top of it all, did his dad have to be so evil and threaten him like that if he ever fails to get good grades? Anyways..."Cholecystokinin...some fucking hormone that..."

"It's a hormone released from the walls of the duodenum in response to the—" Sakura immediately cut herself off as she realized what she had just said in horror.

**Number One rule in the Uchiha Household Maid Handbook**: A maid is not allowed to do any other activities other than her assigned chores.

In other words, if anyone was caught involving in other activities whether it be meeting someone else outside or talking to a family member on the phone during work days, they will be instantly fired.

Work days were from Monday-Saturday with Sunday being a half work day. So even if it was near bed time, no one is allowed to do any social, daily, educational activities because it might stray them from work. The exception is Sunday of course. Uchiha Fugaku was a traditionalist and strongly believed success was based on one's focus. **Simple translation:** **No multitasking allowed during work days. Efficiency is the key.**

"_What_ did you just say?" Sasuke narrowed his eyes and focused all his attention on her.

"I uhh…" She trailed off. If Sasuke finds out how she had been self-studying every night, she knew this time she would be fired for sure since she knew he held deep respect for his father's policies and have fired a maid who broke the rules before. "Um...Do you want some tomato juice? I'd be _happy _to get some for you _sir_. "

"Haruno…" He said in a warning tone and stood up, freaking her out.

_Oh shit…_she panicked as he came towards her. "I-I said umm…."

"What did you just say Haruno?"

"I-I said...I h-had a lot of hormones running within me in r-response to watching you guys make-out?!"

Sasuke stopped in his tracks and just stared at her disbelievingly with his mouth slightly parted.

Inner Sakura: Ok, OK! I know that sounded lame…now stop giving me that look.

"What are you? Perverted?"

"What? NO!" She cried out angrily but then thought better. "I mean…YES! I'm per-perverted!…Cough..."

_God…I need a wall to hit my head on…I never thought I would live to see this day..._

"_You_ are such a weird girl." Sasuke suddenly burst out laughing and ruffled her hair.

"I-I am not." She felt her face go red in embarrassment but sighed deeply in relief in her mind when he didn't question her any further.

"A sick one too."

"EH!"

"But…" Sasuke stopped laughing abruptly and looked her suspiciously. "What is cholecystokinin again?"

_Is this a trick question?! _She looked at him fearfully. "I don't know?"

"Hn…alright." He nodded looking satisfied and went back to work.

Inner Sakura: Hell yeah!! SAFE!

Sakura did a little happy dance and patted herself on the back for escaping the fate of being fired while Sasuke continued with his homework. He twirled his pen in his hand with utter boredom as he looked at his homework questions. _Cholecystokinin… a hormone that's released from the walls of the duodenum huh… _

_...how conveniently smart of her…_

* * *

**Fiery Leaf Private High**

"Sasuke-bastard! Where the hell were you during the weekends?"

"Around." He muttered in annoyance and pushed a bright young blonde away from him.

"With other chicks again?" Suigetsu, a pale sinister looking boy, came and lightly punched him in the shoulders.

"Not really." Sasuke answered and leaned back on his chair. School days were so dull.

"Get yourself a permanent girl man…"

He just raised an eyebrow at his blonde best friend, Uzumaki Naruto, and scoffed. "Like hell…even if I did, this guy would start hitting on her right away."

Sasuke pointed at Suigetsu who was notorious for stealing other people's girlfriend and dumping them a week later. He didn't mind though because he, himself, didn't plan on getting a girlfriend anytime soon. Certainly not anyone in this freak school. Although a certain number did cross his mind…but only for a second.

"Incoming…Kakashi alert." Naruto called as their teacher, an infamous masked man, entered the room.

Sasuke finding nothing to do, folded a little paper plane and sent it flying towards his teacher which landed perfectly in his silver hair.

"It flies! It scores!" Naruto laughed along with the other students in the class. The girls in the class sighed dreamily as they stared at their handsome prince of ice. Tall, jocky, smart, hot, rebellious…he was every girl's dream boy. Sigh.

'Sasuke, we love you!!' They mouthed and sent hearts flying towards him which he expertly ignored. Luckily for them, Karin wasn't in them same class as them. That was all he could say.

"Uchiha Sasuke…" Kakashi said in a warning tone and got the piece of paper out of his hair.

"Yes?" He snickered.

"Detention."

_Score. _He thought contently.

* * *

**Uchiha Mansion**-

_Swoosh! _

Sakura grumbled in annoyance and threw the basketball Sasuke scored from the bed to him. Ever since he came home from school, he had been in a bad mood and ordered her to stand in the middle of the court to catch the balls he shot. It turned out his plan backfired.

Flashback.

"Sasuke this is your fifth detention." Kakashi mused as all the students left for school.

"You know why I do it." He answered carelessly.

The teacher just sighed and pulled out his favourite book. "Why don't you just go to your father Sasuke?"

"What? And persuade him?"

"Yes, at least try to."

"Whatever."

"Sasuke!" A voice interrupted them.

Sasuke turned around and refrained himself from scowling. "Karin..."

"Babe, why are you still here? I thought you were going to take me home today!"

"Detention."

"Detention?! Again?...What did you do this time?"

"Being a dumbass and not paying attention in class." Kakashi answered for his student and sighed. Sasuke was really hopeless. Although it was true that Sasuke was a dumbass and practically never paid attention in class in his life. Sometimes, he really wondered how he always manage to get the top scores in his grade.

"Yeah, so Karin you go ahead without me." He ordered.

"Nah, I'll stay with you. Don't want you to get too lonely now." Karin smirked seductively.

"Yeah...real lonely..."

End of Flashback.

_Swoosh! _

"You know Mr. Sulky-Face, you caused me a lot of trouble today."

_Swoosh! _

"So?"

_Swoosh!_

"...Does it even concern you that I might get killed by your maids one day?"

_Swoosh! _

"No…"

_Swoosh! _

"..." Sakura held the ball in her hands and placed a hand on her hips.

"What?" He furrowed his eyebrows.

"I think I had enough of your manipulating." She said coldly and walked towards him. "What is it that you're planning to do Uchiha?" She daringly placed a foot on his bed and leaned against it in her usual 'ahem' manner.

"Tell me just why the hell do you order me around, tease me, and play around with me at times while at other times, you act coldly towards me and act like you don't know me at all. Why do you dislike Karin and yet you make out so passionately with her? Tell me, I can handle the truth."

Sasuke just looked at her calmly and closed his eyes. "None of your business."

"But it IS my business! This IS my life you're controlling right now! I'm not a toy Sasuke! I'M a human being and I think I'm the only one around here who acts like one." She said angrily, tightening her grip on the basketball. Her hands were just itching to wham the ball against his head.

"Come closer."

"What?"

"God…I really need to take you to the hospital one day to check up your ears. I said come closer." He ordered with his eyes still closed.

"..." Sakura looked at him for a second. He really looked really cute, but that wasn't the point. She wasn't sure if she trusts him enough to follow his orders.

"Sa-ku-ra."

_Ack! He said my name!! _She flinched in surprise and shivered slightly. _Maybe he's serious about this…should I? _Cautiously, she dropped the basketball in her hands and crawled on top of the bed to where Sasuke was. There better not be any tricks. "Y-Yeah?"

With one quick movement, Sasuke swung an arm around Sakura's neck making her yelp and pulled her close to him just so her ears rested in front of his mouth. "I don't understand…what is it that you want?"

_Shit...he fooled me again..._

"W-What I want?" Sakura stammered, too shocked to do anything and was paralyzed slightly when Sasuke's light cologne filled her nostrils sweetly like poison.

"Yeah…do you want money? Fame? Popularity? Things?" Sasuke listed in her ears hotly. "What do you desire the most?"

"Why are you asking me this?"

He smiled against her ears giving her the chill. "I'm curious."

"Well…Sasuke," Sakura found herself grasping tightly onto his school uniform and his bed sheet partly out of a rising anger. "I want money, that is true. I want things, that is true. I don't give a shit about fame or popularity nor do I give a shit about _this_. But...I'm not like others jerk and I want you to know something. I may want money and things because I _need_ them. However, as for what I desire…you can never ever give."

"What is it that I can't give?" He asked softly, not letting her go.

"My mother."

**Fin**

* * *

**Haha, I guess everyone liked virtual cookies too much and left a very yummy review :) Sadly, I ran out of cookies…but then…I thought about distributing sausages…but who likes sausages!! Bleh…so…I'll give you a choice…**

**Ice cream or You scream :P **

**Readers: You scream! **

**AHHHH!! There, I screamed…do I get a review now? –Smiles- **

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	7. My: Time Machine

**Warning: Utter Randomness**

* * *

"What is it that I can't give?" He asked softly, not letting her go.

"My mother."

**M**

**Y**

**T I M E M A C H I N E**

Sasuke stared in silence at his newfound human plushie and wondered if his ears had failed him. _"My mother." _was definitely the last thing he had expected to hear. He stared and he stared hard. For a minute, Sakura's eyes looked as cold as his. (For a minute.) Then resentment and emotions started to fill those empty orbs as she looked away.

He thought she was going to cry but she didn't. Instead, she just focused her gaze at some invisible object in the air. She looked like a doll in his opinion. Sakura chuckled bitterly on the inside as she refused to look back into Sasuke's penetrating gaze. _I wonder how he's going to reply to that…_

"So if I give you your mother, you will fall for me."

"What?" This time, she was the one who was shocked and for a moment she really did believe he was going to give back her mother.

Inner Sakura: Snap out of it…

Sasuke just looked at her in a thoughtful acknowledging manner and repeated his statement. "You heard me. If I gave you your mother, you will fall for me."

_Is this a joke?! _She screamed inside her body and stared at him with wild eyes. He didn't sound like he was teasing but then again he didn't sound like he was serious either. If he seriously liked her that much and wanted her to fall for him, he sure didn't look like it. It was more of a simple sagacious statement. "This isn't funny Sasuke."

"I'm not trying to be." He shrugged with a grin. "Like I said, I'm curious. I want to know just what kind of a guy you would fall for."

"Someone that's totally different from you." She muttered hating his manipulative nature.

"Ouch." He pouted innocently and released her from his grasp. Sensing freedom, she immediately pushed herself away from him and stood up. Her chest felt oddly cold having been used to Sasuke's warmth in such a short amount of time.

Ignoring the longing for warmth again, she smoothed out her skirt and looked at Sasuke who was still sitting comfortably on his bed. "Sometimes I wonder…"

"Hm?"

"Sometimes," She repeated looking at him with an unreadable smile, "I wonder what goes on in that brain of yours and if you're ever true to your words…if you know what I mean."

"Do I?" He answered coolly.

Sakura just shrugged. "Who knows…you seem to be capable of everything a human can do and yet you're overreaching, claiming that you can do something godly. Think again Uchiha, no matter what, you can't bring her back…what's done is done, I've accepted that a long time ago - you _can't_ go _back_ in time, the **past**…nor can you make _me_ fall in love with _you_."

Before he could reply she bowed courteously and left. He couldn't help but wonder if she was tired of his controversies. Nonetheless, he was determined. Sakura had underestimated him.

He wasn't just the God of Sex. He was a something more that she will just be about to witness.

And.

There was no way. NO way, he _couldn't_ make a girl fall in love with him. He hasn't lost in his own game, not yet, and never will.

He smirked. No way.

She **will** fall in love with him for sure like the rest of the _bunch_.

* * *

**A Day **

Sakura stood quietly as she watched Sasuke play basketball with his school friends in his room. Ever since that day, Sasuke hadn't teased her or attempted to share a few words with her except for the occasional 'Haruno, bring me a sandwich' or 'Haruno, get me my clothes'.

The only significant thing he had said over the past week was today when he told her to put on his mother's black wig again when his friends came over to play basketball. Truth to be told, she missed arguing with Sasuke. It had been fun and somewhat refreshing to argue with someone in the lonely dull mansion. Now that he stopped, her life had gone back to the old boring maid lifestyle with an addition of constant death glares from other maids including Banana.

She couldn't help but think _maybe _Sasuke was mad at her for what she said that day. _But what I said was the truth! He can't believe himself to be a god or something that can bring another person back to the past! And there's no way I would fall for that playboy liar…no way… _

"One-Sixty-Seven, ball!"

"Wha-?" Before she knew it, a brown leather basketball flew her way and hit her square on the forehead with a loud thud. "WHAT THE FUUU--"

_((-Rap critics they say he's "Money Cash Hoes", I'm from the hood stupid, what type of facts are those,- If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one-)) _

"Yeah?" Sasuke greeted impatiently, picking up his sleek black iPhone and running over to Sakura who was cussing like hell. "Some other time Karin, I'm busy at the moment. I'll call you back later."

"_Hey! I heard a girl's voice! Who's th-"_

Sasuke, not bothering to let her finish her sentence, threw his phone to Naruto and knelt down by his maid in distress with a teasing grin. "Jeez, can you be any more observant and ladylike?"

"Well I'm so-rry sir for not paying attention to your boring game and for offending you with my colourful ABC language. I mean…I _did_ get hit by your fucking basketball you know…and it _did_ hurt like a mother having a baby." She replied sarcastically, rubbing her bruised forehead, and momentarily forgot that his friends were there.

"Not mine; it was the blonde idiot who threw it." He smirked. Although he also wanted to add 'How did you know it hurt like a mother having a baby?' along with his statement but outsiders were around.

"I'm s-sorry?" Naruto stammered in the back as he gradually recovered from shock along with Suigetsu. If his eyes weren't mistaken, did Sasuke just threw his newly bought iPhone carelessly at him and run to _this_ maid's side as if he 'cared' for her well-being? And did _this_ maid just swear oh-so-rudely-in-an-ahem-fashion at her boss as if she's not _in love_ with him _un_like his other maids AND get away with it?

Playboy or not, ice man Sasuke always regarded women as trash and if yes indeedy he was currently seducing this maid, there was still NO WAY he would've picked a woman over his technology or show signs of seduction in front of them unless it was a dare. And there was NO WAY he would just let anyone who offended him so casually slip away without insulting back knowing that major genetic disease that all Uchiha's carry known as Super Uchiha Ego aka S.U.E.

Na-uh.

Women to Sasuke was trash. Toys. A game. Nothing more.

They were unworthy and their values were placed lower than his possessions. But to see Sasuke cast aside his iPhone so instinctively…

Something was going on and he, the holy awesomely awesome great Uzumaki Naruto, doesn't know about it. –Le Gasp!- This meant only one thing. Time for Uzumaki the Great to find out.

"Hey, are you ok?" He asked, running over to the maid he had just hit. _She seems cute...weird eyes and hair colorization though… _

Sakura, in response, looked at the blonde stranger with wide eyes and nodded.

"Sorry about that, I'm Uzumaki Naruto, Sasuke-bastard's number one best friend." He introduced with a big smile.

"Ah…nice to meet you too sir." She bowed, not knowing what to say. Her forehead still throbbed like hell. However, the blonde seemed approachable and friendly enough - more so than that other sinister looking silver-haired friend of Sasuke's.

"So what's your name-"

"Yo, let's get back to the game dobe," Sasuke rolled his eyes and interrupted the blonde before he could pry anymore knowing his nature. He couldn't let him know about Sakura yet. Especially with Suigetsu around. "Go get some ice packs One-Sixty-Seven. You're dismissed for the rest of the day."

Sakura flashed him a look of confusion before nodding and going out of the room, but not without Naruto noticing a strand of pink under the black. "Hey, what's that pink thing under-"

"Dobe, where's my phone?" Sasuke interrupted again and pushed Naruto towards the basketball court.

"Over here, but I thought I just saw-oh never mind…you'll probably think I'm stupid or something…"

"Well, technically…you are stupid." He muttered and glared at Sakura urging her to leave the room before anything else happens.

"Heyy! I'm not stupid you bastard!"

"Right, tell the whole world that and I'll show off my nude ass if they agree with you." He smirked and looked over at Suigetsu who was being awfully quiet. "Something wrong?"

Suigetsu snapped out of daze at the cool yet demanding voice and smiled, shaking his head. "Nothing, nothing at all. Let's play."

"Hn." Sasuke grunted, tossing him the basketball. Somehow he wished he couldn't tell that Suigetsu was lying.

"So you'll really show off your nude ass if they agreed with me?"

"Shut up Naruto."

* * *

-xXx-

"Man, I need a facelift…"

"Sighh…can we please get back on the topic piggy?"

"Dude, I need to cut my nails too…"

"Aargh, I give up…"

"What did you say?"

"...I said, I have a sudden urge to masturbate right now."

"Oh ok…now where's that nail trimmer- wait…WHAT?!"

"You're hopeless."

-xXx-

* * *

**Another Day**

"Haruno, when's your birthday?"

"My what?" Sakura blinked in surprise as Sasuke twirled his pen lazily and leaned back on his chair.

"I said, you deaf person, when is your birthday?"

"Uhh…" She looked at him utterly confused. This was probably his second time saying something significant to her ever since that day. But that wasn't the point. The main point was, whenever he decided to say something significant to her, why are all his statements so inconveniently weird?

Sasuke didn't seem to notice the oddity behind his questions and raised an eyebrow. "Are you an orphan?" He asked bluntly.

"What?! Hell no! When I said my mom passed away, that _excludes_ my dad thank you very much!" She huffed glaring at him hoping he did not set off a bad omen.

"Then how come you don't know your own birthday?"

Sakura scowled and crossed her arms. "I do know when my birthday is. It's just that your question threw me off track."

"So when is it?"

She thought for a moment and counted with her fingers. _Let's see…the last time I checked…it was March fifth…so that means…today is…_

"Today."

"Huh?" Sasuke looked at her in confusion and saw that Sakura's eyes were slightly widened.

"Today." She repeated in a bewildered manner.

"What about today?..."

"Today as in…my birthday is today?"

Sasuke quickly checked the date on the bottom right of his computer screen and arched his eyebrows even more. "March 28th?"

She just nodded and looked at herself in awe. _Wow…I'm…eighteen… _She can't believe she had just forgotten her own birthday. That also explained why Ino sent her a bunch of text messages today which she haven't even bothered checking.

"Oh…ok." He answered emotionlessly and growled in his mind. So much for his brilliant strategy of winning his own game.

"..."

"Why did you ask?" Sakura asked curiously, breaking the awkward silence.

"Because."

"Because…"

"Just because."

Inner Sakura: I should've just shut up.

* * *

**I-Catch v3.0: (Special Ad) **Rock Lee. Middle name: Youth. Alias: Thick (youthful) Eyebrows. Age: Young. Hobby: Pursuing youth. Occupation: Youthful beast. Phone Number: 1-800-YOUTH. Email: I'll let you guess on this one :)

* * *

Sakura quickened her pace as she walked down the hallway to her bedroom. She hoped Banana hadn't fallen asleep yet. They really needed to talk and straighten things out. Ever since that day when Banana inconveniently mistaken that she and Sasuke had something going on which they clearly didn't, Banana had been going to bed earlier than usual to avoid her and had been giving her the I-Don't-Know-You treatment.

_Come on…come on…please be awake! _She pleaded and swung open the door.

-Snore-

"Great." Sakura muttered angrily as she watched Banana huddle under her blue blanket snoring softly. She failed for the fifth time trying to catch her awake. Damn Sasuke for keeping her preoccupied up till now. Seizing her clothes and towel irritably, she stomped her way to the bathroom and took a long hot shower thinking of ways to ditch her job tomorrow.

Sighing, she slipped on her comfortable blue cotton pajama pants and a large white T-Shirt that allowed her to move about easily. Thank god it was night –the moment of the day she treasured the most for it was the only time she could get out of that scratchy maid uniform and out of Sasuke's face.

Inner Sakura: Free at last!

She cheered opening her door and ready to pounce on her bed that had been welcoming her since forever.

"Yo."

_Eh? _Last time she checked, all her bedroom appliances couldn't talk. Blinking hard, she checked again and the first thing that came into her mind was the grim keeper. But then her mind started to turn and register, making her heart fall.

"What the hell are you doing here?!"

She thought she was free!

"I'm taking you somewhere." Sasuke said casually, lying on her bed as if it was his own.

"Where? To hell?" She hissed, hoping Banana was still sound asleep.

"Something even better." He smirked and got off of her bed smoothly before grabbing her arm.

"Hey! You can't just take me where ever you like! I didn't even say ok yet!" Sakura tried to shout in a whisper and yank her hand away but failed miserably.

"I can because I'm you're boss. Now get a move on before we wake up the others." Sasuke said in annoyance and pushed her into his Porsche.

"Fine Mr. I-Think-I-Can-Do-Anything…my ass! Where are you taking me? This isn't some kind of kidnapping is it?!"

Sasuke just paused and look at her for a second.

"I'm not an alien –cough- you know. So don't look at me like that."

"Ha, well you must be one to think I would kidnap you. Why would I even want to kidnap you when you live in my house? That doesn't make sense…"

"_You_ don't make sense!" Sakura shot back and stuck out her tongue.

"Oh?" He said in an amused tone as he sped down the empty street. It was two am in the morning after all and hardly any people were outside apart from the hoodlums.

"Yeah! Do you know how much trouble you've caused me?! Right now Banana, my only friend in this goddamn mansion, won't talk to me because she thinks I betrayed her!"

"Who the hell is Banana? Are you talking about some kind of fruit?"

"NO! I'm talking about one of _your _maids you ignorant fool! My roommate!" Sakura threw her hands up in exasperation. It annoyed her how Sasuke wasn't the least affected by her anger. _Say sorry or something!! _

"Why the heck is she called Banana?"

Inner Sakura: You're as hopeless as Ino...

"Uhh…why the heck are you called Sasuke?"

"Fine, what did you do to make her think you betrayed her?"

"By becoming your personal maid. Now she thinks I'm trying to get you…psh, like hell. So you see…it's all YOU'RE fault."

"Hey don't look at me," Sasuke rolled his eyes. "It wasn't my fault that she didn't have enough trust in you."

"..." That shut her up. What Sasuke said was indeedy true. "Well…she's human." She replied slowly, still trying to defend her 'friend'.

"Hn…you know, if you drink milk and eat banana at the same time, you'll get some seriously explosive diarrhea." Sasuke recalled witnessing a gruesome sight of Naruto and…yeah.

"What?!" Sakura half cried in confusion and deeply raised an eyebrow. "Nice information but what does_ diarrhea_ have to do with anything!"

"Nothing, just something that popped into my head." He smirked and pulled his car to a stop. "We're here."

Sakura blinked and looked out of the car to find a grassy meadow illuminated by the moonlight. She had to admit, the place was very peaceful and pretty but…

"Are you going to seduce me?"

Sasuke just kept wearing that trademark smirk and got out of the car. "Are you seducible?"

"No." She answered and got out of the car herself. A light warm breeze swept against her body and strange enough, she somehow felt at peace with the jerk.

"I wasn't going to anyway. I like sexier ladies."

"What?! Are you saying I'm not sexy?!" Sakura growled following him as he made his way towards the middle of the meadow. The undisturbed knee-length golden-green grass parted as they cut across.

"Are you trying to suggest something?"

"Wha-N-No…B-But-"

He cut her off.

"Look."

She did. Her eyes followed his outreached fingers and walked the imaginary path his index finger had made. And then she saw - a vast black canvas with hundreds, no, billions of dazzling white, blue, red, purple, and golden stars.

"Did you know," Sasuke bent down and huskily whispered in her ears. "That light travels 299,792,457 meters per second?"

"No, light travels 299,792,458 meters per second." She corrected without thinking, still in a state of daze from the hidden wonders of the universe.

Sasuke grinned at her answer and continued. "You see those clusters of bright stars behind me?"

_One…two…three…four…_

"I see seven."

"The cluster is known as Matariki, the Pleiades star cluster in the constellation of Taurus. In old times, Matariki were used as navigators and have been regarded as a symbol of the new years. See that blue-white brightest star among the seven?"

"Yeah…"

"That's Alcyone, the brightest star in the constellation, 440 light years away from earth…"

"Why are you telling me this?" Sakura furrowed her delicate brows not comprehending. He didn't make sense at all...

Sasuke just smirked and took a step back drawing her forest green gaze towards his own piercing obsidian ones. "Just think, 440 light years away. If it takes _that_ light, that travels _faster_ than anything in this world, to travel for 440 years to get to earth…what does that mean? What are we _actually_ seeing right now?"

"What are we actually seeing right now…" she echoed softly, thinking. For some strange reason, an image of her mother appeared in her mind. Then, it clicked.

Her eyes widened in astonishment making Sasuke chuckle proudly. There was nothing he can't do. Not only was he the God of Sex. He was the Master of Manipulation. A prankster. A prodigy. A genius.

"Still think we can't go back into the past Sakura? Well guess what? We're looking at the past right now girl." Sasuke concluded his physics lesson with a light laugh.

It was that moment when a sense of respect, awe, and interest sparked within her heart making it pump excitedly, faster than ever before. And not only did her world of the outer universe broaden but also her perception of Sasuke as well. She hated to admit it, but he suddenly looked hotter than before.

"Quit staring, I know I'm hot." He teased and watched as that amusing angry expression of hers appear on her smooth face.

"D-Don't flatter yourself! Just because…just because…" She trailed off with a small smile that she had been trying to suppress down. _Just because you showed me this… _

For once in her life, she felt as though she could move on again and let her mother go and rest in peace in the heavens. There was no longer regret and sorrow in her heart but only a feather of lightness. Who would've thought the stars would show her that. Who would've thought _he_ would show her that.

Sasuke watched his maid as her graceful pink hair flutter softly against the cool breeze and her white shirt pressed against her curves from the impact of the gentle wind. She looked pretty amidst the green grass that glittered under the moon. (For a moment.) The way she tried to tune with nature by stretching out that elegant neck and arching that back of hers, she looked so full at ease as though a heavy weight had just been lifted off her shoulders. Strange enough, he felt content and light as well. And for once in _his _life, he felt he had done something right.

"Hey." He called gently, bending down once again until their nose barely touched.

She didn't move nor blush. But hell, her heart was pounding like mad.

"I brought you the past; will you fall for me now?"

And for a moment, she thought she was going to say yes.

**Fin**

* * *

**Hahaha, done!! Corny, OOC, and random as hell right? But meh, I actually liked this one. And for once, Sasuke and Sakura are actually going somewhere with their love life! Sasuke's ringtone:**

**Jay Z - "99 Problems" **

**It's a bit inappropriate, but u'll see why I chose it. If not, you probably already know since the lyrics are kind of obvious. Which leads me to another point, yes...it's sad that Sasuke is just trying to earn Sakura's love for ****fun****, but meh... he's human and for now. He doesn't have a heart. He soon will though :) **

**The whole little physics idea had been killing me ever since last year and I had always been trying to fit it in one of my stories but could never find the right moment. But alas, here it is! Who would've known physics was actually helpful lol. **

**And yes if you had noticed, I had a little "A Walk to Remember" moment when I was writing this. If you don't know what it is, it's a movie and I highly recommend it. It is really really really really good. And sweet haha. But anyways, back on business. **

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	8. Banana Sundaes with Jealousy on Top

**Hey fellow prisoners it's been a while hehe. And no... I am not dead... although I should be telling that to myself. I am sorry for the lack of updates once again but is it just me or has nobody been updating recently 0.o...**

**Anyways, my god...DAK IS MAD!! But I'll rant after this chapter. Anywz, I had never typed so many replies to reviews in my life before haha…I guess I really suck at explaining things since a TON of ppl didn't get the physics thing. That's ok...glad you liked the last chapter. My biggest hit! Lol, hope this one will be too. Alright, here I go before I go hysterical out of madness. **

* * *

"Hey." He called gently, bending down once again until their nose barely touched.

She didn't move nor blush. But hell, her heart was pounding like mad.

"I brought you the past; will you fall for me now?"

And for a moment, she thought she was going to say yes...

**B**

**A**

**N**

**A**

**N**

**A**

**-**

**S**

**U**

**N**

**D**

**A**

**E**

**S**

**W I T H J E A L O U S Y O N T O P**

Sakura just stood there staring into Sasuke's deep eyes as their foreheads leaned against each other for support. His smirking lips were just a few inches from hers and her legs buckled as his arms started to enclose around her waist. She felt her lips quiver and her mind whirl. Should she say yes and fall for this guy? That would mean she would be giving up everything she stood up for.

But her current situation was _just_ so tempting. She was a human after all. _Humans can sin...maybe I should just...it wouldn't hurt me right?..._

She felt her eyes starting to droop down as Sasuke slowly pulled her in.

_Maybe...maybe I...nobody will know right?..._

They were so close, their hot breathing gently tapping each other on their anticipating mouths, and the scene...the scene...gentle warm breezes enwrapping them as they stood amidst the rustling golden meadow under the soft moonlight. Everything was _perfect_. Like a movie.

_It will just be a small kiss...nothing big...it won't mean anything,_

Her hands traveled up his torso and around his neck. She was scared shitless, it was her first time kissing a guy...it was wrong...he was a playboy but...it just felt so right.

She leaned in.

Sasuke smirked as the chick in front of him lost control and kissed him. He had won his game. As God of Sex, there was no woman he can't win over. _Gotcha Haruno..._

Inner Sakura: Think again!

He frowned instantly as his lips met plain air where Sakura's lips were supposed to be. Instead of feeling lip contact, he felt a soft sweet peck on his smooth cheek and the warm body in his arms pull away from him.

"It takes a lot more than that to make me fall in love! Especially with someone like you!"

Sasuke couldn't help but growl in frustration and surprise as his maid laughed and skipped her way towards his car. Regaining his cool with a smirk, he followed after her with more interest than before. _Dang, she really had me going..._

"So you like to play hard huh?" He asked coolly as they got into the car.

"Not hard Uchiha. I like to play _smart_. Only idiots would ever fall for you hehe. I know your game." She said matter-of-factly.

"Oh? Just don't take it back when you fall for me in the end."

"Pshh, as if!" Sakura scowled. "Although, I admit...what you did back there with the stars and all earned you some brownie points."

"Heh, I would think me letting you kiss my sacred cheeks would earn me some brownie points." He teased and as expected, her face turned red. "I bet you never kissed anyone before."

"Y-You wish bastard! And that kiss was just a sign of thanks dimwit!"

"Sure."

"Damnit, now I'm pissed again...this means no more brownie points for you."

"Whatever."

* * *

**-xXx-**

"Ohhhhhhhh my god!! That was soo sweet! I wish a guy would do that for me!" Ino gushed.

"Ha! If it was a sweet, loyal, caring, not-playboyish guy that doesn't suffer from S.U.E (Super Uchiha Ego)...then I would be gushing too! But the fact that oh-so-fortunate-me just had a salty-

"The opposite of sweet isn't salty...its sour... that's why they invented the Sweet and Sour Sauce. Lovely things by the way."

"Ino!! Can you PLEASE stay on topic?"

"Ok. God damnit, I just chipped my nail."

"..."

-Beep- -Beep- -Beep-

"Sakura? Hello? You there? FOREHEAD GIRL?! Ackkkk, she hanged up on me! That bitch!"

-Ringgggg-

Ino picks up her phone.

"You bitch!"

"Hehe...I _finallyyyy _got your attention."

"Yeah, yeah whatever'now what happened next?"

"Say I love Sakura, the best person in the world, and _then_ I'll continue my story entitled A crappy Day and A fucked up Life of Haruno Sakura."

"You bitch."

**-xXx-**

* * *

**The Uchiha Mansion **

"Sasuke, it's all your fault."

"What, what did I do?" Sasuke retorted defensively. The last prank he did on her was like weeks ago. And mind you, it was an awesome prank.

"Banana won't talk to me!" Sakura whined grabbing her hair.

"Oh. That again." He rolled his eyes and went back shooting his basketball. "I told you already, it's not my fault that she's jealous of you."

"Can't you just love her?!"

"Oh that's easy for you to say." He stopped shooting halfway and looked at her with slight annoyance. Didn't she know he was already having a hard (YET) fun time trying to win her over?! "So you want me to love a fruit?!"

"For the last time Mr. Ignorant...She is NOT a fruit! She is a human being! My roommate! One of YOUR maids!" Sakura cried in frustration. This just sucks. Up to now, Banana, her only friend in this mansion was _still_ ignoring her.

"Yeah whatever. You're asking me to do the impossible."

"Can't you just try?"

"Like hell. I mean if-" Sasuke suddenly smirked as he noticed Sakura pacing by his bed. "If..."

"If what?!" She pressed.

"_If _she was hot like Karin _**or…**_" He roughly shoved the b-ball in his hands towards his maid causing her to yelp and collapse on his bed in attempt to catch it.

"...o-or..." Sakura gulped, backing away towards his bedpost as Sasuke came nearer and nearer.

"Or..." He grinned darkly, overshadowing her body with his. "If you give me a kiss...then I might consider helping you."

"What?! No way!" She blurted and glared upwards at him. Sasuke however just shrugged and climbed off of her.

"Alright, your loss. You can't say it's my fault now cuz you see...I offered my help." He snickered making her feel guilty, "And _you_ turned it down."

"You bastard!" Sakura growled throwing his basketball at him. _I'LL KILL HIM! _

She was just about to get up to strangle him when a knock from the door came interrupting her.

"What?" Sasuke said loudly as they heard Mina's voice on the other side of the door.

"Sir, Miss Karin is here."

"What?!"

Sakura's eyes widened too as her ears and inner bitch-radar picked up the word Karin. Both she and Sasuke scowled as Sasuke quickly went over to his closet and got out her other worst enemy. _The wig._

She knew the drill...as long as a stranger or Karin comes inside the mansion; she had to wear _the_ wig until they leave. "This sucks."

"You shouldn't be complaining." Sasuke looked warily at her and exited the door. Sakura sighed and hastily put on her wig, following after. He was right, she did pity him for having to put up with a bitch like Karin...but then again...she didn't know why he was putting up with her in the first place because he effing refused to tell her why.

So...her sympathies quickly disappeared like a smoke. Plus she still didn't get why he was making her wear a wig every time a stranger comes although... it did was sort relieve her because then, people won't see her weird pink hair. But anyways... _Die bastard die! _She cackled inwardly as she went downstairs to meet the monster. Upon meeting Miss Bitch Number 1, Sakura realized that Karin had totally forgotten about her and still treated her like crap.

Not that she was surprised. _Crap always happens to me..._

"Sasuke-babe!! How come you never called me when you said you would call?" She whined in a baby voice tugging at his arm.

"Cuz I was busy."

"Really? But I just heard from your maids that you were playing basketball."

_Damn…_

"Did they now?" Sasuke shot venomous glares at his other maids causing them to whimper in fear and delight. Hallelujiah! Master Sasuke had finally noticed them!

Inner Sakura: Cheh, fembots.

"Well whatever, let's go drink some coffee." Sasuke slightly curved up his lips naturally and led his girlfriend to the lounging room by the waist with a bored Sakura following after.

"You know babe, the HS banquet is coming up next month...any plans on what to do after?"

"Karin, the banquet is _next_ month which means there's still a _month_ to decide on what to do after."

"But it wouldn't hurt to plan it right—"

"Excuse me, your coffee."

Sakura's jaw dropped as soon as she saw the maid that brought the coffee in - quite on the contrary of Sasuke who had his attention focused on his girlfriend before him. But heck she was even about to scream out in delight. _Bananaaaaa!!... _Banana gave her a quick tired look before bowing down her head and preparing to exit.

"Sasuke, who is that? Seriously, doesn't your maid have any manners at all? Interrupting me like that!"

"I-I'm sorry Miss..." The poor maid bowed again apologetically. Sakura just looked at Karin in anger, but the star didn't seem to notice.

"Seriously babe, who does the recruiting in your household? How come they always pick the ugly shitty ones? Look at her glasses...those are so last century and that red hair! It looks hideous and unwashed unlike mine. Even if your household management can't teach them how to serve properly...at least tell them to pick ones that looks clea-"

"Shut up bitch."

Sasuke, hearing the low angry hiss, snapped his head in Sakura's direction. Sure Karin was being a bitch at the moment, but it wasn't her first time witnessing Karin like this. So why the sudden outburst? Thinking quickly and thoughtfully, he looked back at the tearful girl who had just brought them coffee and suddenly realized this redhead was Sakura's notorious dear friend Banana.

"What...did you say?"

_Oh shit..._Sasuke returned his gaze back at his girlfriend again who looked extremely pissed off at the moment. _Sakura, you better shut up and not cause me any trouble..._

"I said oh-holy-one, shut the fuck up bitch." Sakura said defiantly and crossed her arms. Sasuke just mentally slapped himself on the forehead. Great, if he was lucky enough...Karin won't make him fire her.

"Sasuke, I want this fag fired!"

_Oh great..._He rolled his eyes. _More trouble..._

"And I want this lousy redhead fired too!"

"What?! You can't fire her! She did nothing to you!" Sakura exclaimed angrily and balled up her fists.

"Her ugliness makes me want to puke already and you call that nothing? YOU there, what's your name?" Karin turned towards the shaking girl.

"B-B-Banana..." The maid croaked with hot round tears streaming down her freckled face.

"_Banana_?! What kind of a name is that?! You know...I once heard a story about this Aboriginal girl who had three brothers. So this girl was like to her mother, "Mom, why is big brother called Thunderstorm?" And her mother replied, "Because we had him during a thunderstorm." And then the girl asked her mother again, "Mom, why is second brother called Tornado?" And her mother replied, "Because we had him during a Tornado." And then the girl asked her mother for the final time, "Mom why is little brother called Hail?" By now, the mother was very annoyed at her daughter and answered, "Because we had him during a hail storm dear. Why do you ask Broken Plastic?"

Sakura gawked at Karin as she finished her joke with a haughty snicker. "Don't tell me your parents had you under the banana tree!"

Banana, who finally couldn't take it anymore, just let out a loud sob and ran out of the room.

"And you!" Karin turned over to Sakura, "What might your name be? Orange?"

"Definitely not bitch unlike someone in front of me!" She spat and ran after Banana.

"WHA-"

"Karin, go home now." Sasuke sighed standing up.

"What?! How can you say that?! You're not going to punish them after what those fags did to me?!" The girl stood up angrily.

"You weren't exactly very angelic yourself. Now go."

"But..."

"Karin." Sasuke growled and glared at the chick. His patience was slowly running out.

"Whatever. They better be fired when I come here next time." She snapped while grabbing her Gucci bag and stomped out the door.

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes and ran to Sakura's room. If his calculations were correct, they should be in there.

* * *

**I-Catch v4.0: **Physics class. Three snoring students plus one attentive boy with thick eyebrows plus one perverted teacher.

Today's lesson: vibrations.

"...So you see...as long as they move, they are technically vibrating. There are longitudinal waves which vibrate like when a woman shakes her booty and then there's the transverse wave which vibrates like when two naughty people of the opposite sex are on a bed at night –personally, I like transverse waves better because they have more _feel_- but moving on..."

"S-So Kakashi-sensei," The attentive boy with thick eyebrows asked, "Would you say that you are vibrating right now? Since you're moving?"

"I guess so. I did say that anything that moves is technically vibrating. Tehe, I'm vibrating." –Thinks naughty thoughts-

"Ah, I see...I think I actually get this now."

-Room suddenly starts to rumble- (Earthquake)

"Everybody DON'T MOVE! The earth is vibrating!"

-Snore-

"Damn right its vibrating kekeke...you have learned well Lee...unlike those three brats there..." Kakashi praised while looking warily at his Team 7.

* * *

**Maid Sect**

"Nana..." Sakura called as she opened the door to her room. As expected, Banana was sobbing like mad on her bed. "Ignore what that bitch said, she doesn't know what she was talking about."

"B-But it's true...I'm not beautiful like Miss Karin. I'm not smart and brave like you. I'm a lowlife nerd that nobody remembers."

"Psh, don't say that. I remember you. The only lowlife here is that stinkin' Uchiha and that bitch."

"D-Don't be like that towards M-Master, Sakura...especially when he's your lover."

"WHAT?!" Sakura cried out and stared widely at her roommate. _You have got to be kidding me...is that what everyone thinks?! _

"I'm sorry for ignoring you Sakura...I guess I was just j-jealous...since you were the one that said you hated Master Sasuke but in the end, you were the one that caught his eyes when me, the one who has been pursuing him for so long got totally ignored...but really, I-I'm happy for you. Master Sasuke has never kept a girl this long before."

"WHAT?!" She cried out again. Has Banana been blinded by jealousy or love or something?! "Listen you, I only caught that bastard's eyes because...well actually...I don't even know...BUT I WILL FIND OUT...ack, that's not the point...the thing is nothing...NOTHING happened between us ok? Absolutely nothing. So don't go on imagining those kind of things. Sasuke and I will never work out."

"Really?"

"Seriously. I can never love that guy even if someone threatened to kill me."

"I don't get it." Banana furrowed her eyebrows. How could anyone pass down on _the_ Uchiha Sasuke?! "What's so bad about him?"

"Oh puh-lease... don't make me repeat myself again. He's arrogant, he's a jerk, he's rude, he doesn't care about other people, he's selfish, but most of all...he's a playboy! God, I don't even get why you like him so much! Nana dude...you can have him for all I care."

"Bu- Master Sasuke!" Banana jumped up in surprise as she suddenly noticed him by the door. Sakura quickly whipped around in fear to see if Sasuke was indeed by the door. _D-Did he hear all of that?..._

Sakura watched as Sasuke coolly walked past her without looking at her one bit. _Oh shit...he's pissed...I can tell...he heard what I said..._She felt colours drained from her face as guilt rushed up in place.

"So your name is Banana?" Sasuke asked gently as he ignored a gaping Sakura behind him.

"Y-Yes sir." The girl stammered and turned instantly pink.

_Tch...too easy..._He thought with boredom. Seeing the girl so easily wooed by him was no fun at all. _So unlike Haruno..._

"What a unique name Banana...I think it's rather cute." Sasuke smirked as the girl blushed even harder and looked down shyly.

Inner Sakura: 'I think it's rather cute'!! Please...that is SO fake! Even I can do better.

Sakura looked at her boss angrily as she saw his playboy nature rising again. But apparently, Banana was too flattered to notice that Sasuke was merely just playing with her.

"You know...if you take off your glasses," Sasuke said huskily taking off his maid's glasses. He didn't fail to notice Sakura trying to burn a hole on his back with her piercing glare. His smirk curved wider as he finished his sentence. "You would look so much cuter Banana."

Inner Sakura: -GAG-

"R-Really? Y-You think so Master?" Banana trembled in delight.

"Mhm. I'm sorry about Karin's behavior today... she... can be vicious sometimes."

Inner Sakura: -Cough- Liar! –Cough- You are so not sorry!

"I hope you don't mind Karin's sudden outburst Banana...don't worry I won't fire you. The most important thing to me is the welfare of my staff." Sasuke cringed inwardly at the corniness and wanted to punch himself for saying such a mushy line. But it couldn't be helped. These methods were most effective when dealing with girls like Banana.

"I-I don't mind at all sir. Its ok, I'm t-terribly sorry for interrupting Miss Karin today. I will reflect upon my mistakes and change for the better."

"Hn, if girls in this world could just be as appreciative as you are...then life would be _so_ much more easier." Sasuke grinned and stood up. Hey, there was some truth in what he said.

Inner Sakura: Life would be so much more easier MY ASS Uchiha.

"Be a good girl for me now ok? See yah." He bid goodbye seductive and exited without even looking at Sakura. Somehow, she found this heavily intimidating and somewhat disappointed (to her surprise) that Sasuke had ignored her completely.

"Sakura! Sakura! Did you see that?! I talked to Master Sasuke for the first time!" I can't believe it! I actually talked to him and he was soo sweet to me too! No guy has _ever_ been this sweet to me before!"

"Yes Nana, he was being real sweet. I think I'm going to take a shower now." Sakura forced a smile and exited quickly with her night clothes. It was useless talking to a lovesick Banana at a time like this. But whatever makes her happy... she had more important things to do anyway.

1) Take a shower.

2) Pay that damn Uchiha a visit.

**Fin**

* * *

**Ehehe...boring chapter...but I promise the next will be filled with more fluff haha...bear with me. Oh, and I dunno how that physics I-Catch thing or Karin's little joke got so horny. Ehehehe... sorry if I disturbed anyone of you. (PS, I am sorry if I offended any Aboriginal readers out there...I truely didn't mean it...I just found the joke amusing that's all. Kudos to you.) ANYWAYS...it is now time for DAK to RANT! Why am I so mad? Why am I so mad?! **

**(Spoilers involved...so just skip to the review button if you don't like spoilers :D)**

**AHHHH!! Have you seen the latest Naruto chapter 412?! OMG!! WTF was Kishi thinking?! Karen looked like she had a fudging orgasm when Sasuke bit her!! And the part where I find even more ridiculous is...Sasuke FUHKIN said "Oh, you saved me Karin." WTH!! Just WTH!! Now all those SasuKar fans are going to make a big deal out of that scene!! –Angry- Yes...as you can see...I made Karen OOC quite a bit but I don't care now. I'm sad because the thing is, SasuSaku fans are like...diminishing bit by bit. Yes readers, consider my inspiration BACK! (Temporary). And you know what makes me pissed as well? NaruSasu...omgg... I don't even know where to start. On deviantart...all I see are well drawn NaruSasu and NONE of SasuSaku. –Pissed off- **

**WHERE'S THE LOVE?!**

**Yes. I am done with my rant now. If I have a magic carpet right now, I would fly all the way to Japan and strangle Kishi until he writes in his manga SASUKE AND NARUTO ARE NOT GAY! Gahhh...I want my Saku vs Kar showdown where Sakura kicks Karen's little pretty ass T.T **

**Ok, I'll shut up now...enjoy the chapter. And while you're at it please review hehe. Next update is: LTN. Yes...I think I put that off for quite a while now. The next Maid chapter will come pretty soon as well if Kishi angers me anymore. Lol, I don't know if that's good or bad...but ciao for now! **

**Thanks for the kudos from last chapter! **

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	9. His: Lady Luck

**Heyo fellow prisoners, thanks for supporting my fics lol. Seriously, it's shocking to see how many supporters there are despite my lack of updates. You guys are SWEET! **

**Before I continue, there are some dedications I would like to make. **

* * *

This chapter is for…

Dangerously Emerald: Don't give up yo! And thanks for actually reading my profile and telling me about _it_. It's really sweet to see someone that cares :)

Princess Bhria: who pm-ed me like crazy to update haha.

* * *

"Sakura! Sakura! Did you see that?! I talked to Master Sasuke for the first time!" I can't believe it! I actually talked to him and he was soo sweet to me too! No guy has _ever_ been this sweet to me before!"

"Yes Nana, he was being real sweet. I think I'm going to take a shower now." Sakura forced a smile and exited quickly with her night clothes. It was useless talking to a lovesick Banana at a like this. But whatever makes her happy… she had more important things to do.

Take a shower.

Pay that damn Uchiha a visit.

**H**

**I**

**S**

** L A D Y L U C K**

Left

Right

Right

Left

Turn

_Creeeeeaaaaakkkkk--_

_Shyt…_Sakura winced as she quickly lifted up her foot from the squeaky floorboard. Who would've known sneaking into Sasuke's personal quarters would be _this_ hard. The trek included passing three wooden paved grounds, two marble floors, and one carpet area. On top of it all, it was 1 AM in the morning. Guards were patrolling outside the mansionand surveillance cameras were literally placed in every corner.

But anyhow, it shouldn't be too much of a problem for the great Haruno Sakura. After all, God not only granted her a brilliant mind but also a cunning talent to get around to things. Passing through her final landmark - the carpeted 'Madam Uchiha's Exquisite China Gallery' room, she quickly ran up the whitewashed granite stairs and headed towards Sasuke's room.

Upon arrival, she slowly went over her options as to how she should make a grand entrance.

A) She could kick the door open and shout, "Who do you think you are Uchiha!" whilst waking up the entire Uchiha residence.

B) She could knock politely, wait until her master opens the door and _then_ shout, "Who do you think you are Uchiha!" whilst waking up the entire Uchiha residence.

C) She could just stand there stupidly and not go in while thinking, "Who do you think you are Uchiha!"

Or…

D) She could just open the door (assuming its unlocked) and barge in and hiss, "Who do you think you are!" and murder him afterwards whilst _not_ waking up the entire Uchiha residence.

_Choice D it is. _Her inner self thought without hesitation and grabbed a hold of the handle, twisting it mercilessly. Surprisingly, it _was_ unlocked and she got in without a problem.

"Who do you-"She stopped midsentence as she saw a half naked Sasuke, clad only in a towel, in front of his plasma TV.

_Frick…why do I get myself in the most scenic situations…_

"Would you mind knocking? Or did you walk in on purposely knowing that I am only in a towel." He smirked after a moment of shock from the sudden intrusion.

"I-It's not what you think! And h-how am I suppose to know that y-you were only in a towel?!" She stammered, shutting the door behind her a little too hard causing a loud noise.

"Uh-huh, I soo believe that." He answered, switching off his TV, and went over to his wardrobe.

"Hey seriously! Who wants to look at that (_fatally drop-dead gorgeous, but hell, I'll never say that in front of him even till the day I die) _fugly body of yours!" She retorted and stomped her way to him.

"Say what you want Haruno, I know what's going on in your mind." The man shrugged casually, trying to pick out which clothes to wear. Ironically, they were mostly black and if he was trying to choose which boxers to wear then Sakura would start to think that he seriously have a problem because each pair looks exactly the same to her.

"You're a jerk you know that? But anyway, that's not even why I'm here…actually; yes…that's why I'm here." Sakura smacked herself for inflicting self-confusion. "What am I saying…You _are_ a jerk! What the hell was that all about back there with Banana?!"

"Uhh, I think I was hmm…what do they call it…oh yes, comforting her." Sasuke said sarcastically.

-Poke-

"Comforting my ass! You were totally playing with her! I can see it in your eyes." She growled, poking him in the chest.

"Hey, who was the one that told me to love her?" He said in annoyance and glared at her as he remembered what she had said behind his back.

"I…I didn't mean it like that!"

-Poke-

"What I meant was for you to** try **to love her!" Sakura cried in frustration.

"Oh, and as if that wasn't trying at all. At least I approached her ok? And seriously…why should _I_ even bother to listen to you if I'm SUCH an arrogant-"

-Poke-

"Jerkish playboy that doesn't even care about-"

-Poke-

"anyone at all! Will you stop-"

-Poke- -Poke- -Poke-

_Gahh…_If only she could poke through his skin and into his beating heart so he would die right here right now. So in the end, he makes it seem like it was all her fault?!_ No…it was all Sasuke's fault! If he hadn't been such a jerk wad, maybe I wouldn't have said those things about him! So why is he making me feel so guilty?!_

-Poke- -Poke- -Poke- -Poke-

"Hey! Stop poking the hell out of me!" Sasuke hissed loudly and grabbed her hand. It was then and there when she realized how small her frame was when compared to his. He was literally towering over her and she could barely see her hand inside Sasuke's warm ones.

In addition, due to her newly discovered distance between herself and Sasuke, she could actually see tiny water droplets rolling down his thick black hair and feel the subtle heat waves emitting from his semi-wet body indicating that he hasn't been out of the shower for long.

Inner Sakura: It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes!

_Shuddup! _She hissed in her mind and looked timidly upwards to meet him in the eyes. _Damn hormones… _To her uneasiness, she found that Sasuke was starting to smirk playfully. _What the heck…I thought he was mad! _

"Umm…uh…" She protested in a tiny voice as her heart paced faster under his sly expression. She tried tugging her hand away as well, but Sasuke held on firmly.

"If I'm not mistaken," He said slowly, cornering her so that her back was against his wardrobe door. "I'd say _you're jealous_ Haruno.

"W-What?!"

Her? Jealous?! HA! How could she be jealous? If someone asked her if she felt anything for him at all, she knew would search hard in her heart and still find nothing. Sure she may have felt something when she saw him for the first time but definitly NOT now.

"You're dreaming." She gritted her teeth.

"Am I?"

"..."

"And you know what? _You_ owe me an apology."

"...No I don't, what I said was the truth." Sakura said stubbornly, still staring at him straight in the eye.

He grinned darkly and brushed the bottom of her chin with his other hand, "C'mon…you don't mean that. If you give me a kiss, I'll forgive you."

Sakura cursed her luck. How on earth did she always get into these types of heart-stopping situations where she was either pinned against a door, bed, or a wall by Sasuke?! Stop with the pinning! On top of it all, Inner Sakura was making it harder for her to deal with the situation. The little voice inside her head kept on telling her to just get the hell on with it and jump at Sasuke like a wild lion and kiss the living daylight out of him. Rawr.

_NO EFFING WAY! _She cursed at herself. She would not let him and his sex appeal triumph. "You are despicable Sasuke."

"I am so scared." He rolled his eyes and let go of her. "I was just joking anyways. Who in the world would want to kiss a girl with a huge forehead?"

Sakura's jaw dropped forgetting that Sasuke had almost seduced her. _Did he just diss my forehead?! _"What did you say?!"

"I said, you forever deaf person, who the heck would want to kiss a chick with a MONSTROUS forehead!"

"I DO!" She shouted, not caring if she woke the entire world up, and searched around frantically for something to throw at him. For the first time in a long while, she was in luck. Beside her was a stash of Sasuke's detestable identical boxers.

"Go die dickhead!" She spat, throwing every boxer she could get her hands on at him.

"Yo YO! Respect other people's underwear will you?!" He said loudly as he watched Sakura throw his personal clothing at him but end up aiming it somewhere else. At least _aim_ right! Respect the boxers damnit!

Grabbing his pillow, he threw it expertly at the girl causing a satisfying shriek and a bunch of colourful curses afterwards. But his victorious smirk quickly disappeared as he soon as he saw the girl run straight at him at top speed with his pillow and pounced on him before he could react. He landed heavily on his back while Sakura jammed his pillow onto his head trying to suffocate him while sitting on his toned abdomen.

* * *

-xXx-

"Thou shalt not diss thy forehead." Ino said sagely.

"Good, good…now if I can only get that commandment through his thick head…"

-xXx-

* * *

Sakura laughed as she finally got a taste of pinning down Sasuke instead of the other way around but then stopped when she sensed a weird stillness below her. Sasuke had stopped moving and now lay beneath her quietly. She waited for a long time for his chest to start rising up and down but it just kept disturbingly still. _Oh crap…did I kill him? _

Slowly, she lifted up the pillow to her chest and gulped as she peered over it to look at Sasuke. His face was emotionless and unmoving. Even so, he was still unquestionably hot. But shaking the naughty thought out of her head, she cautiously bent down and poked his cheeks to see if he was still alive. No movement.

"Oh shit…I am going to get in so much trouble for killing my boss…" She muttered sarcastically and placed her ear close to his nose to listen for any signs of breathing. Still no sign of movement. "Please don't be dead…I still need money."

"Well that's nice of you."

"OW!" She yelped as Sasuke on purposely shouted into her ears and before she could even attempt to get up, Sasuke had wrapped both of his long built arms around her to stop her.

_Dang it…not again…_she groaned as she started feeling nervous again at their close proximity.

"As your punishment for backstabbing your boss…" He whispered into her ear causing a chill to run down her spine. "You owe me a massage tomorrow."

Hearing a satisfying surprise gasp of horror from his captive, he untangled himself from her and pushed her off. But not before taking a note of the wildflower scent that lingered in her hair.

"I suppose you'll forever hold a grudge on me for today." Sakura said grimly, sitting comfortably on his bed.

"No kidding." He said in his usual sarcastic manner and changed into his basketball shorts behind his wardrobe door. He was used to sleeping in them from time to time. "Haruno, go pick up every one of my boxers and wash them in the morning."

"What?! WHY?!"

"Because you're the one who threw them on the ground with your poor aiming skills!"

"But why do I have to wash them?! The ground is perfectly clean! I vacuumed them just yesterday!"

"Too bad." He grinned wickedly. "Because I said so."

"Stupid, no-good, spoiled son of bastard." She muttered under her breath and picked up every one of his CLEAN boxers on the ground half-heartedly. "Dude…go get yourself some rainbow boxers." She suggested, remembering the time when she first met Sasuke somewhat properly face to face in the laundry room.

"Why don't you get them for me if you like them so much? I'll wear it just for you." He joked coldly. As if he'll wear rainbow boxers.

"That would be good _sir. _Anything is better than plain old black boxers._" _

"Stop lowering my boxers' self-esteem damnit."

"They suck! They suck! They suck!"

"You've got issues woman."

"Damn right I got issues!" Sakura huffed, dumping the pile of boxers in her arms on top of Sasuke who was now resting on his bed. "Black boxers are so gloomy. You just try washing them everyday!"

"I don't need to." He flashed an innocent grin and pushed his clothes to the ground. "Cuz baby, I'm _rich_." He tried his best to imitate Karin knowing it would really piss her off.

"If you weren't my boss, I would punch you already." She glowered.

"Funny." Sasuke said mockingly and pulled her down beside him before she could even complain.

"What the heck do you think you're doing?" Sakura demanded bewilderedly, struggling to squirm out of his grasp.

"Sleeping." He answered simply.

"The. Lights. Are. Still. On." She informed dryly, not knowing what to say or how to react. She was strong, but not strong enough to fight him.

Sasuke grumbled tiredly and leaned over her to get a remote on top of a drawer beside his bed and clicked the lights off. "There, now stop complaining."

"There is no way that you're making me sleep with…..you." She finished her sentence with a heavy heart as she realized Sasuke had already fallen asleep. He must've been really tired. Either that, he's really good at feigning sleep. The moonlight from his window was bright enough for her to make out his exhausted complexion as well as her current state. Sasuke had already locked his arm firmly around her waist and buried his head against her shoulder like a baby.

She thought about slapping him awake and bolt out of the door when she have the chance, but sighed and threw the idea down the drain. There was no use in that. What could she do? If she woke Sasuke up, she would get in trouble. Not that she was afraid of losing her job. She was pretty sure Sasuke had no intention of firing her. Still…she didn't want to get on his bad side. Especially after unintentionally backstabbing him. Not that she cared… -cough-

But heck…she was feeling guilty again. Curse him for making her look like the bad guy. Sighing again, she relaxed her body as a sign of giving up...temporarily. She hated to be honest with herself, but it actually felt nice sleeping with someone (in a pure sense of way). It reminded her of the time when she would sleep with her parents when she was still young.

Moreover, her inner self was saying the all too famous line, 'it couldn't hurt to be like this could it'?

Of course it hurt. She was hella confused despite acting all stubborn and resisting on the outside. Here was a drop-dead gorgeous guy who is clearly just playing with her like some useless object while she, having experienced this sort of intimacy for the first time, battles the endless war of whether she should just give in to his play and coming out like a battered ragdoll or stay strong until the very end and end up being a confused fragile porcelain figure. Both were equally bad.

To be even more hatefully honest, she wasn't sure if she hated Sasuke entirely. But then she didn't want to like him either for he stands against every moral she stood up for.

_Stop worrying and sleep_…her body told her. Aargh..But she needed to figure everything out and sort out these mixed emotions…

Inner Sakura: Hey…enjoy while you can. It's not everyday a guy would just sleep next to you without wanting any sex.

_Maybe…_She bit her lips skeptically still trying to figure out whether Sasuke was a good guy or a bad guy.

Inner Sakura: Just go to sleep will you? If he wakes up in the middle of the night and attempts to rape you, at least you'll have some energy to counter him whereas if you don't sleep at all, you'll just be a useless marionette lying there waiting to be raped.

_Fine…if you put it that way…_Sometimes, she wondered why she even had this polar-opposite voice speaking inside of her and giving her so many useless explicit details.

_Sleep_…her body urged her.

_Alright, alright! _

Gently pulling Sasuke's cover on top of her, she willed herself to sleep after ten minutes of trying to ignore Sasuke's warm breathing that seared her sensitive neck every six seconds. What joy…

* * *

**Fiery Leaf Private High** – 8:10 AM

"Yo bastard! Seriously, where have you been for the past few weeks? It's been ages since you joined us in b-ball." The infamous blonde loudmouth flailed in front of Sasuke.

"I've been busy." He answered emotionlessly and propped his head on top of his palm as he surveyed the school's lush courtyard. Kakashi was late again as usual.

"He's been busy with some slut I bet."

Sasuke's pupil focused on his white-haired friend as he stayed motionless. Question marks started popping all around Naruto for he had always been the clueless one.

"Eh? eh! What? A chick? Sasuke?" He furrowed his eyebrows and looked at the bored Uchiha. "Sasuke, have you been hanging out with a chick that we don't know about?"

To his surprise, Sasuke actually _smirked_!

"Oh, like your smirk totally tells me everything I need to know." The blonde grunted sarcastically but was quickly shushed when Suigetsu placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Actually blondie, his smirk tells us everything. Who's the chick Sasuke?" The demon-boy grinned barring his dangerous sharp teeth.

"Want to meet her? She's off-limits though." He grinned, although he hated the idea of getting Suigetsu involved. Suigetsu always took interest in the girls he played with and although he'd always let him have them, he wasn't about to give up Sakura anytime soon. However, after thinking about it for some time…he concluded that the only way for his plan to work was to include the other devil himself.

Naruto, who couldn't keep his mouth shut from hearing all the juicy drama, jumped excitedly in front of Sasuke's desk and stared at him with wide sky-blue eyes. "Really? Really? There really is a chick?!"

The renowned playboy ignored Naruto completely and continued staring at Suigetsu mischievously. "So? How about it?"

"Hmm…I sense that you're going to use me for one of those notorious plans you have…"

"Maybe."

"...Alright." He grinned sadistically again after comtemplating for a while. "I'll join in and agree with the conditions…_for now_."

Knowing Suigetsu, it was probably the best result he could get out of him. Lifting his head from his palm, he smirked at the loudmouth who was currently jumping around, itching to be noticed; and at the sadistic friend who so happens to be the school's president's son.

"I want you to help me enroll this chick into this school." He said simply as Kakashi finally came into the room with some usual lame excuse trailing behind.

**Fin.**

* * *

**The next chapter will come soon…or so I say. I think this time it's for real though. Although I shall update Lovers to Never will come before that. Thank you for waiting so patiently. It really means a lot to me. Well, until next time! **

**–Takes a bow-**

Re-edited on December 25, 2008


	10. Dangerous Voice

**Heyo fellow prisoners... is it just me.. or does KISHI FRICKING SUCKS!!! Seriously... destroy Konoha? Somebody just shoots me. ****(SPOILERS ALERT)**

So you see, during these past few weeks, I have been mulling over what a tragedy Naruto has been and have been counting the characters that Kishi killed with my ten fingers. And lets see… so far… he has killed… A HECK LOT OF PEOPLE.

But yes, of all the dead people… I dearly miss Jaraiya and Kakashi the most… (I still refuse to believe the latter is dead…) so… I decided to dedicate today's eyecatch to our pervy senin. Which means..

**WARNING: PERVERTED I-CATCH UP AHEAD!! **

* * *

**D**

**A**

**N**

**G**

**E**

**R**

**O**

**U**

**S**

-

**V O I C E**

-

-

-

-

Sasuke knew he could never count on having his plans go smoothly. There were always these annoying setbacks that comes along his way. And just when he felt like maybe...just maybe his plan might go smoothly, Karin just had to bounce her way up to him and link hands with him for all to see that after-school.

"Babe, let's go to your house today." She self-invited herself.

_Does this girl have no shame?!! _He groaned and nodded reluctantly. With Karin strutting by his side looking down on the entire awestricken female passerby, he rolled his eyes as he went over his current situation. It did not help with Suigetsu prowling behind the back of his minds. Sure they were best buddies; they go way way back in a peculiar kind of way. But hey, never threaten a man especially his property.

Karin, much as he would hate to admit it, was technically the only property that Suigetsu laid his hands off of. Lucky him. He actually asked the silver-haired man before as to why he never tried to woo the red-head, but all he got was a grunt and a shrug.

"So what do you think about that red satin dress I bought last week?"

"W-What?" He jerked his clueless attention towards his girlfriend.

"Are you even listening Sasuke?" She pouted.

"Uh my bad, I had something on my mind."

"Really? That's rare, what's bothering you?"

"Why don't I give you a ride to my house?" Sasuke calmly changed the subject as he opened the passenger seat door for her.

Karin, who didn't really sense any threat to Sasuke's thoughts, just smiled and stepped into his car. "Sure, I already called my servant to take my car home anyway."

"Aa." He kept a tight grin as he closed the door as gently as he could. _Does this girl seriously have no shame?! _

* * *

_(AN: Skip the I-Catch part if you hate perverted graphic stuff.)_

**I-Catch v5.0** **(Special Ad) - Jaraiya Jaraiya**

Middle Name: Sexy.

Alias: Pervert.

Age: The age of sexiness.

Hobby: Pursuing the ultimate sexiness.

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-

-

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...**Yes. **

Have you ever wished you could just kill that kid next door for randomly blasting you with his _latest_ oh-so-shiny water-blaster that his parents bought for his birthday?

**Yes.**

Have you ever wished you could just break that little kid's _latest_ oh-so-shiny water-blaster because that stupid little kid can't stop bragging and blinding you with its shininess to your face?

**YES.**

Have YOU ever wished you could just have one of those _latest_ oh-so-shiny water-blaster of your own?!

**OMG YES! YES!**

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED YOU HAD A TOOL TO MASTERBATE?!

**HELL YE--What??......**

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....**.**

That's right, be shocked and leave that jaw hanging. This little buster is guaranteed to let everyone in your neighborhood drool including adults! It will make you increase your sexiness by ninety-nine point nine percent (in case if there are a few minor setbacks) AND it will definitely blind that stupid little kid next door with its hellish milk jets! So what are you waiting for?! Start dialing 1-800-TITTY-BUSTER today and order a package of your very own! The funds are non-returnable and the milk and gun are sold separately. Not suitable for ages thirteen and below.

Do you think you have what it takes to be on top? **(winks)**

Copyright to America's Next Top Model. See in stores for more details.

* * *

**Uchiha Mansion – 4:00 pm**

Upon arriving to the grand halls of the mansion, Sasuke prayed that Sakura had her wig on. They have been through the procedures at least a thousand times before. Every time Sasuke come's back from school, Sakura was to check if he had brought any of his classmates over and if so, she has to go put on her wig so that she wouldn't attract any attention.

_Haruno...you better have your wig on...I'll skin you alive if Karin sees your hair... _He prayed. Nicely.

But it wasn't until a few minutes after they rested in front of his big plasma TV in his room, when _Mina_ came in to greet them which stroked a few question marks on top of his head.

_Mina? _He arched an eyebrow. He hadn't seen his chief maid since...forever. And sadly, if she hadn't shown herself right at the moment, he would've forgotten her existence already.

"My master, Maid 167 says she's busy right at this moment and asked me to take her place today." The head maid said with a graceful curtsey.

"Of course." He nodded slowly and eyed his staff. _Since when have I told Sakura to do something else when I'm gone..._

Mina however, smiled and continued to act like nothing was wrong and brought forth some 1967 wine with two glass goblets. Karin's eyes narrowed as she watched the maid slowly pour the red liquid into the clear glass. She recognized this maid. This brat was always the one who would glare at her whenever she visited and stick to Sasuke like glue wherever he went.

If she remembered correctly, Sasuke had made her the head maid of the mansion sometime ago. _Which probably means...she and Sasuke have some history together...Well now...let's see about that..._She smiled back in the same sort of plastic smile as she accepted the glass of wine from her.

"Babe, I see your staff improved by quite a bit. It's not everyday a mere maid knows just what type of wine that I like." Karin complimented sweetly while swirling the wine inside the goblet.

"Hn."

"So what's her name? I've seen her couple of times before when I came to your house to _play_ around." She said casually, watching in delight as Mina's hand semi curled up into a fist.

It didn't take a genius to figure out that there was some sort of cold war going on in the room. And Sasuke was quite aware of this. He was also quite aware that he told Karin who Mina was a couple of months ago when she flipped out after seeing Mina wearing one of his shirts at night. As to how Mina got his shirt, he didn't know. But that incident caused him a heck lot of trouble and he knew that he did not want to go through that mess again.

"She's my head maid, Mina." He answered, going with the flow.

"Mina?" Karin echoed.

"That's me miss." The maid gave her a toothy smile that was probably as fake as toys.

"I'm hungry. Get me some roasted chicken salad with Thousand Island sauce on it." The red-head ordered while lifting up her bare legs and resting it on Sasuke's lap. No one can deny how attractive her legs were but the fact that they belonged to Karin.... _Meh_.

_Where the hell are you Sakura? _

* * *

**Laundry Room**

Sakura knew she shouldn't be surprised to find herself in the same predicament as one month ago: washing clothes in the laundry room. Though by now, she had somewhat conquered her phobia of identical boxers and maid uniforms. Holding up a maid skirt that belonged to some chick numbered fifty-five, she threw it carelessly into the number four dryer.

So the real question was...how did she get herself into her situation?

Simple.

_Mina._

She had been making Sasuke's bed that morning like every good maid should when she received a surprise visit from her leader who ordered her to do a series of task. With Sasuke gone, there was no one who could stop her so not knowing what to do, she complied with her in the end and followed obediently.

Besides, she needed to do some personal laundry anyway and she was sure Sasuke could handle a couple of hours without her.

* * *

**Master's Bedroom**

"Here's your salad Miss. Karin. Freshly roasted chicken with our newest imported Thousand Is-"

"AHHHH!!"

"Oopsie."

-Groans-

Sasuke sank low to his couch as Mina 'accidentally' tripped and spilt the whole bowl of salad onto Karin causing her to scream in anger. To make the situation worse, Mina 'fell' (more like throw) herself onto him in the process causing Karin to turn even more red.

"You **little** BITCH!" She screamed, covered in salad dressing and lettuces.

"I'm so sorry Miss, it was an _accident_." The servant replied innocently.

"SASUKE!" Karin roared.

Sasuke heaved a sigh as he pushed Mina off and rubbed his temples. This is why he never dated or bothered having a real relationship. He hates obsessive girls.

- Insert Sakura – Speak for yourself!

"Mina, get out of the room right now." He ordered tiredly.

The head maid looked at him with a hurt expression before turning her heels to leave.

"If I see your stickin shit of a face again-"Karin muttered.

_ARGH I HAD ENOUGH! _Mina screamed in her mind as she jerked around with an angry face. "Sir, excuse me. But I will **not** leave this room especially with this slut around."

"ME?! Slut?! Why don't you look in the mirror yourself? Tripping and landing on Sasuke like that. HA! Give me a break." Karin scoffed loudly. "Sasuke, I demand this bitch to be fired!"

"SIR! If you fire me, I **will** **te**-"

"THAT'S ENOUGH you two." Sasuke interrupted abruptly and glared angrily at the two madwomen.

Mina just smirked bitterly knowing she had pulled the trigger.

"Karin, get yourself clean and I'll take you home in ten minutes. As for you..." Sasuke said coldly, roughly grabbing his maid by the arm and pulled her out of the room before both women could protest.

"Do you plan to lose your job?" He hissed once they were out.

"No sir."

"Then what is it that you want?"

Upon hearing the question, Mina's eyes couldn't help but tear up as she searched those cold black eyes. _Wasn't it obvious? _

"...I want you." She whispered.

Sasuke groaned and combed his hair with his hands. _Of course_ _she wants me...like ten million fricken girls out there..._

"Listen Mina, the screwing that we did before? That means nothing alright? Just forget about it."

Truthfully speaking, he was feeling downright guilty for giving Mina false impressions. He thought it was obvious that all of his playboy nature was just a hoax and that none of it was meant to be real.

"What are you saying..."

"Damnit, why can't you-"

A kiss from his head maid was totally unexpectedly uncalled for. For a few seconds, Sasuke just stood there stunned as the female grabbed his head passionately and started French kissing him. "G-Get a hold of youself!" He growled against her lips which made her horny. Ignoring his resistence, she just continued planting wet kissed against his lips savoring every moment.

"Mina stop. STOP god damnit."

Damn. Now she had made him angry.

"Mina, what do I have to fucking say to make you realize that I don't love you?" He scowled, holding onto her shoulders to restrain her from advancing.

"N-No, that's not true. You still love me. You still love me. T-That's not true." She sobbed.

"Get a hold of yourself woman. Our past is history. _None_ of it meant anything."

"No...No...NO!"

"MINA! If you don't accept this right now...I am going to fire you."

Damnit. People should just call him god right there. He didn't want to be nice but he had no choice. To ease his conscience, not firing the girl was the only way he could think of for screwing around with her.

"...."

Hearing no reply, Sasuke looked intently at the chestnut girl's silent expression. Sighing deeply, he slowly let go of her and prepared to head back into his room to pick up Karin. "I want you to clean up the mess in my room after this and take th day off tomorrow."

"I'm not going to give up."

He turned around. "....what?"

"I'm not going to give up." She repeated. But this time, her words were louder. Clearer. Stronger.

Sasuke couldn't help but laugh in disbelief. "Are you a fool?"

"No sir." Her lips quivered, but she quickly bit on them to stable them again."And let me tell you this my master, I still don't accept your rejection and if you fire me, I will tell them all about Maid 167, Haruno Sakura."

"Is that a threat?"

Mina jolted slightly at the response. She wasn't expecting such a icy, calm tone from him. It scared her. The way his voice dramatically lowered and his gaze as still as a grave. Nonetheless, she willed herself to be strong. She firmly believed in the saying, hard work goes without pay.

"Y-Yes."

"Tch. Do whatever you want Number One." Her master brushed her off coolly and left for his room without further notice, leaving her to run to her room for refuge.

* * *

**Sasuke's Car**

"So what happened to that girl." Karin asked tersely, after a long moment of silence.

"She is on the verge of being demoted from the position as head maid and I will find a suitable punishment for her when I have time." He lied.

"I thought I said I wanted her fired."

"Karin, I can't just fire servants without my dad's permission."

Again, another lie.

"But-"

"Enough said. We arrived Karin." Sasuke interrupted mercilessly. "I'll make it up to you for what happened today."

"You better." She grunted and went out of the car in anger. _Sasuke is being unfair and he fricken knows it. He owes me big time..._

* * *

**Uchiha Mansion – Maid Sect - 12:30 am**

Sakura hummed happily as she pranced down the hallway clad in only underwear and a piece of thin towel. It was all thanks to Mina really – for relieving her of her duties with that stinkin' Uchiha. It had been a long time since she felt this free and the fact that she forgot to bring her personal laundry back to her room didn't bother her at all. She could just borrow pajamas from Banana and fetch her clothes tomorrow. No sweat. Her shower felt extra good too. It was one of those late showers again where everyone was asleep and the bathroom was free of any other life form. Well, expect for that stinkin' mosquito that tried to attack her left buttocks. But, aside from that everything else was good.

She had already planned out her schedule for the rest of the night. First, she was going to call Ino and tell her about her fabulous day minus the laundry and the mosquito. Second, she was going to study study and study andddddd then she was going to sleep and have an awesome dream that's completely chicken-free.

The taste of freedom sure felt good.

After arriving to her room, she quietly opened her door and tiptoed in only to let out a silent scream. _Not this again..._

"Nice view." Sasuke smirked, cushioning his head with his hands.

"I-Y-You-Wha-" She stammered aimlessly as her hands immediately shot up towards her chest and her face turn beat red. _OF ALL THE TIME IN THE WORD, HE CHOSE TO FRICKIN COME TO MY ROOM WHEN I'M FUCKIN HALF NAKED!! ARGH...crap happens to me..._

"Get out now Uchi-"

"You..." Sasuke interrupted with a low voice and shot up from her bed. Sakura cursed herself for letting a small yelp escape from her mouth at the man's sudden movement. Her head jerked towards Banana's direction in alarm - she hoped they weren't making a ruckus. No movement. Thank God Banana was a heavy sleeper.

"Look Uchiha-" Sakura threatened but was cut off when her master closed in and dropped his head on top of her bare shoulders.

_Er...is this rape? _She raised an eyebrow.

"You idiot...I'm so tired because of you."

"Uhh....huh?"

"Where the hell were you this afternoon?" He whispered making Sakura really confused. His voice was even more confusing to her. He sounded..._sad?! ...__vulnerable? _

"U-Um...what happened?" She asked hesitantly and restrained herself from shaking as Sasuke gently enclosed her with his arms. _Did someone's pet turtle die?..._

"I'm so tired Sakura."

_Ok....he said my name. He's serious about this. This is bad. _

She knew she would slap herself a thousand times after what she was about to do, especially when she's only clad in a towel, but they say a best cure to sadness is...a hug? Putting down her guard to the best of her ability, she slowly moved her hands from her chest to around his back.

"It's ok Sasuke." She said in her best soothing voice. _My god, I'm in a fudging towel! _

"Really?"

Freeze.

_Oh my fuc-_

D-Did she just feel a smirk against her skin? His voice sounded so innocent and sad that could easily deceive anyone. But not his smirk.

"U-Uchiha, let go of me now."

"Why _Sakura? _You caused me a lot of trouble today. Do you know how tired you have made me? You owe me two massages now."

"But I haven't done anything!" She growled in protest, withdrawing her hands and violently pushed against Sasuke's chest. However it was no use. She was locked.

"Oh really? Who gave you permission to switch with Mina today?"

"Umm... Uhh.. hey, you're being unfair-woo-ahhh!" She yelped as Sasuke grabbed her by the waist and carried her to his room. She thanked God that Banana was still asleep.

"Sasuke, put me down now. This isn't funny." Sakura spat and almost screamed when he dropped her roughly onto his bed. _This says rape all over! _Her mind yelled as her body curled up protectively in a fetal position.

"You're annoying."

"Eh?" She peered over her arm and saw Sasuke unbuttoning his school uniform while searching through the closet.

"Wha-Whatt did I do?! I don't even know what I'm doing wrong." She sat up angrily only to have pieces of clothing thrown in her face.

"Well first, you could've worn some clothes after you showered instead of prancing about, naked in the hallways. What if someone else sees you?!"

"Not naked, _half_-naked Sasuke. And the only pervert that saw me was YOU. Besides, if you must know, I forgot to bring back my clothes when I was doing laundry. If you hadn't barge in and pulled off that stupid puppy stunt like that, _I _would've borrowed Banana's clothes and gotten dressed already." She said sarcastically, furiously pulling on his shirt. She wasn't an idiot and didn't need to be told that the clothes were meant for her to wear.

"Whatever."

"So ever." She stuck her tongue out. "Turn around Uchiha. I'm changing."

"Jeez, it's not like your body is worth anything to watch."

Her jaws dropped. "Y-You...." Jamming her legs inside his oversized basketball shorts, she grabbed the nearest pillow and...

"Missed." Sasuke smirked and stared at the pillow that now lay on the floor, approximately three meters from him.

"Why thank you for informing me." Sakura huffed, watching him as he picked up his pillow and came towards her.

"No problem, now I'm going to sleep."

"Hey hey! You dirty bastard, you haven't even taken a shower yet!"

"I'm tired, I'll shower in the morning...unless you want to help me take a shower right now."

-Smirk-

"Idiot-Gahh!"She yelped some more as Sasuke collapsed on top of his bed, bringing her down with him.

_Ok...so what if he smells good even if he hasn't taken a shower yet..._

Inner Sakura: Yeah, so what!

She felt her face burn as Sasuke draped an arm across her shoulder with one hand and closed the light with the remote control with the other.

"Uchiha if you think I'm going to sleep with you again, then you are so-"

"Jeez, can you just shut up for one minute woman?"

Sakura felt like she could punch his face a thousand times at that moment. _EXCUSE ME?! _

"Bastard."

"Heh, you know Haruno...I think the reason why I like you so much is because you hate me... unlike them."

"Huh?" Her eyes widened in surprise. She wasn't expecting that sort of response. _What?! He? Like? Hate? Them?! _

"W-What do you mean?! W-Who's them?!"

-Snore-

"........Bastard."

**Fin**

* * *

**Holy frick, longest chapter yet haha. Though not much fluff which makes it mehh. I'm sorry about the slow progress. It can even put House Bunny to shame which I saw two days ago. (Sorry, House Bunny fans...although I did like the part where Shelley was like, "You guys, your eyes are like the nipples on your face." HAHAHAH, that was hilarious.)But ahem, yar.... Happy Holidays people haha. I decided to bring Mina back since she kinda disappeared in the past chapters.**

**But anyways, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!! Woot! It has been approximately one year since I started this maid project and I could not have gotten this far without you! So thank you!! Lovers to Never will be coming up shortly and so is Miss. Understood. Hopefully before the new years. So stay tuned!!**

**Thanks for your support and if you have noticed, I semi re-edited every chapter of this fic. Yes, every chapter hehe. So enjoy! And I hope you have an awesome holiday! **

Updated on December 25, 2008


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